Unan1mous, Episode 3: "A Whole Bunch Cuckoo"

Wow, first the Frinks leave AR, then Mandisa leaves AI. This better be a good episode.

When we last left our lab rats, they had agreed to give the money to Steve, just so they could get out of there. However, Jonathan sabotaged the vote, and Kelly wants out, which would cut the prize money in half. I’ve been looking forward to this episode all week. I’m just afraid I’m going to be disappointed when Kelly doesn’t leave.

I just realized that the word “unanimous” has nine letters. I wonder if that’s why they chose nine people. I should also point out that I’m suffering from lack of sleep tonight. Geek Overlord reminds Kelly (and us) that if she leaves, the prize money is cut in half. Jonathan and Adam try to convince her to stay 24 hours, until the next vote, I assume.

Adam, who is wearing a sweatshirt and skullcap while most of the others are sweating buckets, tells her it’s the only selfless act she’ll ever have to do. Kelly, rightly, takes offense at that. Adam corrects himself that it’s on a major scale. OK, I’m back with him. Kelly says it’s not that major to her. $750,000 isn’t that major? Probably because she knows she’s not winning.

Kelly says there’s no honor among thieves, which really isn’t germane here. (The dad-blamed Germans got nothin’ to do with it! Sorry, sometimes I have to set myself up for jokes. If I don’t, who will?) Vanessa, I think, mentions that apparently there’s no honor in caring about anybody else, either. Kelly says they can fight it out.

Geek Overlord asks if that is Kelly’s final decision. She says it is her final decision (they really never said yes, I’m leaving, but it’s pretty obvious). Geek Overlord asks for the clock (losing one dollar per second, remember) to stop at $1,492,296. I start to figure out half of that, but decide that’s pretty stupid when they’re going to show it in a second.

Kelly will not be held against her will. Geek Overlord demands for the money to be cut in half, which makes it $746,148. I knew Kelly would cause a stir in this game. I had no idea how much.

The others don’t look happy. Geek Overlord says it’s a lesson – they want to win the game, but they need the others to do so. They’ll all lose without cooperation and teamwork. Jamie (?) says they lost already. Geek Overlord tells Kelly she is free to go, and she leaves with a smile.

Yeah, let’s talk about this minister, who is obviously so caring for other people she’ll leave them hanging. She can’t win so she doesn’t care. Instead of thumping her Bible at every opportunity, she should try reading and learning from it. Hypocritical bitch. I am glad she’s gone.

Steve doesn’t understand her decision at all. Bottom line, Steve, she doesn’t have the same values you apparently do. Jameson, in a private interview, screams “Ding dong the witch is dead.” I can dig that.

As she leaves, Kelly says that money is the root of all evil, which is why someone lied in the game. Yeah, like when you lied in real life, defrauded the government and your creditors and probably hide behind the Church of Kelly that consists of you worshipping the almighty dollar. She’s glad she’s not going back. That makes three of us.

Geek Overlord tells everyone that an eligible player has left, and needs to be replaced. So Richard is now an eligible player again! Whoah! I was expecting to bring someone else in. That is a damn cool twist, another screw in this deliciously evil game.

Richard screams an obscenity. At first I think he’s happy, but he’s obviously pissed. Tarah and Jameson ask why the outburst? He’s upset at being humiliated, and everyone thinks he screwed up the vote. Tarah apparently has incontrovertible evidence, because she declares that Richard, in fact, voted for Adam last episode, and if you get a clear look at the Zapruder film, you’ll probably see a jumpsuit with a red X on the shoulder.

He’s upset because now people are saying that he got exactly what wanted by “screwing up the vote” and getting back in the game. Anyone who thought messing up a unanimous vote would get them back into the game after being outcast is pretty whacked out, if you want my opinion. It’s a stretch, let’s put it that way.

Geek Overlord restarts the clock and shoos them away. Jonathan tries to tell Jamie that maybe the person who screwed up the vote is now gone. She doesn’t buy it. I wonder if Jonathan will vote with the group if this happens again. Jamie doesn’t want to live with him anymore, talking about Richard. Boy, will these people have some apologizing to do when they see this. She also says it’s not fun. Boo hoo, next time know which show you’re on before you dive onto the screen like a hooker onto a trick.

Jameson, Jamie, and Tarah discuss Richard. They have convicted him. Geez. Jameson was furious when Richard exploded. He now knows why Richard is an outcast in real life. Fine talk from someone who was arguing about being pre-judged because of his sexual orientation just a little while ago.

In a mini-group meeting (minus Richard), Jonathan is still trying to sell his thought that Kelly was the culprit. Vanessa wants to process what is going on with Richard. Hey, an intelligent person, how’d she get in? Adam explains that Richard feels betrayed. He agrees, saying that it makes him look guilty. Seriously, of all the players, Richard had the least to gain by not voting with the group, because he had no chance to win. The only possible motive was pettiness, and he could have far better accomplished that by just leaving like the hypocritical bitch.

As a result, he thinks he deserves the money, because he’s suffered the most. Jameson scoffs at the idea. Steve says he was trying to keep the group on track – voting for him – when Richard comes in, who is “a whole bunch cuckoo.” It’s official, Steve is awesome.

Tarah is tired of lies. Richard says he’s been honest and gotten his ass kicked for it. He feels like it’s his money up there, to which Adam replies, “Don’t get your hopes up, kid.”