The Amazing Race 10: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly, Episode 12: No Competition

I have to warn you ahead of time – I’m pretty well pissed off by what I saw on my television Sunday night. No, not the elimination of the Barbies, I could really care less about that. No, I can’t believe that Florida is going to play in the college football National Championship game instead of Michigan.

Look, I’m an Ohio State Buckeyes fan, always have been, always will be. I know that a lot of OSU fans are happy, because everyone in the country believes that Florida is no match for Troy Smith and company. I’m upset for exactly that reason. The BCS format was designed to prevent exactly this sort of outcome. The best two teams in the country will not be playing on January 8.

Since I really should bring this around to reality TV and I’ve got very little to say about this episode as it is, it’s like the Barbies being eliminated this week. They weren’t the worst team, but they got screwed by inept producers (more on that in a bit). I want to see the best teams go at it, because obviously that has the best chance of giving me the most spectacular matchup. Yes, it’s good strategy to try to rid yourselves of the strongest teams, but it’s also boring. Given the choice between strategy and exciting action, I’ll take action, thanks. In this case, I think the models and the Buckeyes are going to walk away with it, because there’s just no competition left.

At least with football, the consolation prize is seeing Michigan beat the unholy crap out of the pretenders, USC, in the Rose Bowl.

The Good:

One More Week: This season of boredom and mediocrity is almost over. I doubt I could tell you the names of half the teams this season. Ugh.

The Bad:

One More Week: I have to watch two more hours of this show instead of a football game next Sunday.

This One’s for Wes: How can the producers justify putting a 30-minute penalty on a leg where there were not one, but TWO equalizations? Was there any way on Earth that the teams were going to be thirty minutes apart? I could care less who got eliminated – I will admit that I’m sorry to see the Blondes go and I’ll miss seeing the four of them on my TV, and in fact I was rooting for Rob & Kim to go. Had the blondes had a fighting chance after their early great performance, they might have finished first. The only reason I didn’t turn the channel when I saw they were all on the same flight is that the football game hadn’t started yet.

It’s just poor planning. Yes, I know it’s difficult to plan flights ahead of time when you have no idea when the contestants will show up. But in the future, every “marked for elimination” leg should be self-contained. How many legs have we seen where none of the racers leave the greater metropolitan area? A little bit of foresight – something the producers aren’t worried about this year, apparently – would make the race far more interesting, no matter who wins and loses.

On that note, I have to admit that Bitch & Moan, despite the meltdown of one of the team (no, I don’t know which is which and I don’t care. In fact, I don’t know which is Dustin and which is Kandice, either, or which of the models is which, or which Cho Brother was which, or which cheerleader was which. One of Bitch & Moan is smaller and won’t stop complaining, and the other is built larger and is relatively quiet. Beyond that, who cares. I gave up trying to put names with faces on this show a long time ago). Anyway, beyond the meltdown, they’ve run a very good two legs, stayed calm when they needed to, and congratulations to them for being the only all-female team in the final three. That being said, the little mouthy one is lucky she didn’t get a camel-meat skewer through her voice box, much as I was wishing it would happen.

Just So You Know, Rob: Getting lost on the way to the market and then running around in circles tends to eat up time. Which means, if another team happened to find the clue while you did your headless chicken imitation – now pay attention, this is the tricky bit – they’ll get there before you will. Got it?

Also under the category of “duh,” as my fiancée would say, is Kimberly taking the Roadblock, considering she did the worst on the cow lips. The only thing I can figure is that either Rob is out of Roadblocks (I don’t bother to count) or that they misconstrued “Taste for adventure.” Of course, the latter would mean that they’re idiots and haven’t figured out the subtle nature of the Roadblock clues. The former would mean, well, that they’re idiots for not planning better.

Is it as obvious to everyone else that Rob desperately wants to propose to Kimberly on the winner’s podium?

The Ugly:

You Say Tomato: I think by now, after ten seasons, we’ve had just about all the “one partner freaks out and the other partner doesn’t help by yelling back” discussion we can possibly have, so let’s just take it as read, hmm?

Speaking of Rob & Kim, was I the only one who thought it was appropriate that Rob (“dude!”) would be swimming with giant turtles? He was like, whoah, and they were like, whoah!

Mike DeGeorge is an Accountant from St. Louis and is also Associate Editor for RealityNewsOnline. You can reach Mike at rno.mike@gmail.com. If you're in the holiday spirit, buy him something from his wish list!

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