The Apprentice: Los Angeles, Episode 4 MVP and LVP – Lord of the Bees

Considering the show’s experience with Kinko’s, however, Aaron should have known he needed to delegate the job of marketing. Since we never saw him actually do it on camera, it’s a good guess that he never made who was doing what precisely clear. I think that sending two people out to manage bulk sales was a bad idea. One could have done the job if it needed doing at all. It’s not like buying today’s lunch - buying honey in bulk to sell to customers is a whole different shindig that could be stepping on other people’s vendor contracts. Sending Tim out to be a door-to-door honey salesman would probably have the exact same effect - zilch. Nice try, though.

If Surya left his accustomed spot to “help” someone who didn’t need his help, then he should be prepared for a quick and unceremonious exit. It sounds like Trump doesn’t like him so much if he only got away despite Trump’s frustration with Aaron’s reserve.

Frank and Tim cracked me up. They made a sticky, close second to Lucy and Ethel in terms of entertainment value. I think I understand some of Frank’s loudness. Did you see how often he talked when he was helping with the bees? I blabber when I get nervous, too, my friend.

Tim also did a good job schmoozing Trump in the Boardroom with his coy responses to his plans with Nicole. Turning the questions back on Trump was nothing short of brilliant. He gave Trump the chance to talk about the subject while projecting the illusion that he actually cared. James also turned Surya’s market talk into entertainment without being directly insulting.

Less entertaining was Surya. When it comes to branding, what does honey have to do with versatility? One day is not enough time to get people to believe in your branding. Getting Aimee on his side was a good idea, as she constantly kept Aaron on the defensive. Next time, Surya is going to have to be more prepared to fight his own battles.

So who’s this week’s MVP?

Light streaks softly through gummed-up machinery, past the stricken face of Tim to a new holder: DEREK! Finally, you get rewarded for something other than a Shamu impression. You are funny, intelligent, and not very attached to your dignity - all prime prerequisites for being an Apprentice! You would have won for sheer screen time alone this week. You were there unloading boxes, getting stung, and selling. You masterminded the alliance between Aimee and Surya, devaluing both in Trump’s eyes, as he doesn’t much like alliances. I struggle to find your fingers through the fabric of your glove, lifting you up to sit in the chair next to my Reality Television Goddess throne.

In close contention for this week’s award was Stefani, for overcoming her fear and attacking the bee boxes with both high heels. She also sold well and became de facto product manager, throwing Aaron into action despite his inclination to sit and pout.

On the other side, it would be easy to blame Aaron for his team’s loss, and I do, but I think the person who lost the most cache this week was Aimee. If Derek and the others hadn’t covered for her, her pretty face would be crunching pavement. To top it all off, her antics in the boardroom were over the top. Yes, she didn’t want to make Aaron’s mistake, but she did too little to be that arrogant.

Aimee’s hard boardroom efforts guaranteed two ousters: Aaron’s and her own. I predict she will be the first Apprentice wannabe to receive smacks of the Reality Television Goddess’ scepter two weeks in a row, as her bungling leadership next week will lead her to a precipitous exit. Unless things get shuffled, Aimee is about to be buried under a pile of dead fish.

For now, let us slap her with rotting heron. Next week’s special dish: salmon a la Genevoise.

Things I want to see this season on The Apprentice:

• Sean breaking out into a rendition of The H.M.S. Pinafore and Simon Cowell loving him for it
• Aimee and Aaron in a topless boxing fight
• Derek doing his imitation of Harold the beat-boxing manatee

Jennifer McBride is a senior in journalism at the University of Oregon. Her lifetime ambitions involve bigamy and a plethora of cats. Job offers and Viagra ads can be sent to her at vegetathalas@yahoo.com, though you should use the subject line “Not Spam” if you expect her to find them.

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