America's Next Top Model 4, Episode 4: You Look Fine, What’s Your Sign?

Previously, Brandy struggled with her attitude – surprise, surprise. Rebecca was rushed to the emergency room after she collapsed at the elimination ceremony, but was able to return a bit later. Although Brittany looked the like the porn queen, it was Sarah’s lack of confidence that did her in. There are 12 girls left, who is next?

We begin with the girls waking up. Rebecca still feels a bit nauseous, and talks about how she lost her vision and fainted yesterday. Apparently, she’s had this condition since she was three. It’s a nerve problem, and not life threatening, just a pain in the butt. Oh, believe me Rebecca, I know that feeling!

Brittany is reflecting how she was almost eliminated the night before because of her sex kitten vibe. She just wants to not look like a porn girl. Is that everyone’s dream? Well, not mine… but most? We then see the girls talking about their order of making phone calls, which, understandably, they agree that from east coast to west coast would be the most practical. Not for Brandy though, who comes out ranting and raving that she called dibs on the phone. She starts spouting off that she wants to use the phone, as Tiffany pulls her aside telling the camera that Brandy is a young her. They have a little talk and Tiffany says that she’s glad she isn’t angry anymore, the way Brandy appears to be. Tiffany, I love you so much.

Tyra mail tells the girls that they have to be on point since there is no time for nonsense. Of they go walking into a dance studio, where they meet Stefan Wenta, the owner of the studio. They will be learning ballet today, and he is their teacher. He tells them that good models are always aware of their bodies. They begin their studies, and Stefan has no problems with whacking the girls with his cane, not to mention poking and prodding them wherever he deems necessary. It’s kind of entertaining, but the girls aren’t enjoying it. He tells Naima he can tell she has done ballet in the past, while Tiffany isn’t used to controlling her body like this. They all head out and Stefan looks like he is glad to see them go.

Later that night, the girls head to dinner. Tiffany says that she has never been to a place like where they were eating, then says she never drinks anymore, as she orders a white wine, which you might also know as “Jesus Juice” now. As the wine flows, so do the words coming out of Tiffany’s mouth. You can’t help but love her as she compliments four of the girls, then pukes. Keenyah says that sometimes Tiffany can go back to the old Tiffany, although she isn’t violent or anything. It’s not like she is getting beer in her weave or anything. Tiffany and the rest of the girls go home, where Michelle comforts Tiffany and they relate to being away from home.

The next day, the girls head to lunch. They arrive at a restaurant and are welcomed by Beverly Johnson, the first African American supermodel. She was the first African American to appear on the cover of “Vogue” in 1974. Keenyah says that meeting Beverly is very empowering, as Tiffany says that she finds her inspiring. Brandy asks Beverly about having attitude, and tries to act like she doesn’t have one. Who are you kidding, honey? Beverly says that she needs to learn that things aren’t personal, and not to take them that way. Beverly heads out, and all the girls feel a little wiser.

When the girls arrive home, they find Tyra mail that says that they are in control of their own destiny. The girls pile in a car and arrive at a tennis court. Jay Manuel tells the camera, from behind the scenes, that the girls challenge has just begun, and he will be watching them from behind the scenes. Apparently, the photographer has been instructed to be rough with the girls, and Jay wants to see how they handle the pressure. Before the shoot begins, the photographer tells the girls they better be on the mark today.

Kahlen is the first to go, and only had five minutes to get ready. The photographer tells her to incorporate ballet into her poses. Kahlen tries to ask a question, but it’s never really answered, as the photographer puts her in her place. She thinks he is insane, and when she is done, goes and cries. Tatiana goes next and says the photographer makes her feel like her confidence has been thrown under a car. Noelle wants to slap him on the head, while Brittany is harped on and Naima actually does well under the pressure, with Jay saying she pleased him.

Michelle goes next, and by the time she is done, she also sheds a tear. Keenyah manages to hold her composure, while Christina gets offended when the photographer says that he is scratching her whole roll. Tiffany is the next out, and she looks like she wants to hit him. The photographer tries to make her “bounce” which is similar to something I did at the club last weekend. Who am I kidding, no it’s not. Tiffany goes back to the other girls and tells them how frustrated she got, but kept it together, even though she insulted the photographer with a “your mama” joke. I love her. Lluvy asks him if he will help her with her poses, and the photographer basically laughs at her. She doesn’t do well.

Here’s the moment you’ve all been waiting for. Brandy is the last girl to go. She asks the photographer “Should I look fierce?” and he looks at her like she has six heads. As I’m sure you can imagine, he gives her a hard time, and Brandy says that’s hard for her to hide her emotions – and it shows. Brandy hates to be associated with anger, but knows that the judges see her that way, and is trying to change.

Back at the holding room, Brandy comments that Tatiana always manages to make snide remarks. Apparently, Tatiana makes fun of Brandy, who starts screaming ant shouting back at her that “She doesn’t know her.” Oh dear, I feel like I’m on Maury. Naima says that Brandy looks for excuses to be mad, as Brandy tells Tatiana that she would be “toe up” if she wouldn’t be eliminated for hitting someone. I’m loving this. Christina thinks there is going to be a fight. Brandy seriously needs to curb it.

Apparently, the fight finally ends. The girls head to the court where they find Jay Manuel with the photographer. He tells them that this was their challenge. He has been watching them the whole time, and Kahlen says that you “Just don’t do that to people.” I don’t understand… what did he do that was so wrong? Jay says that the winner will get to go to dinner with someone special, and the photographer gets to pick the winner. He says that he picks Naima, and she gets to pick two people to join her. Naima goes with Tiffany and Kahlen. I’m not sure if I like Kahlen or dislike her. The first person to email me and tell me if I like or dislike her will win.

The girls arrive at the restaurant, and as they are sitting down, in comes Serena Williams! She gives Naima a signed racquet. Serena tells them all how beautiful they are, as Tiffany says that she wasn’t sure if she would get along with Serena or not. Serena informs them that she has her own clothing line, and then has them walk for her. She seems to like everyone’s walk, as Tiffany says that she likes Serena and she is glad that she met her.

The girls get their next piece of Tyra mail, and it tells them that lions roar, so get ready to soar. I don’t get it. Michelle is ready to fly up in the air. I’m sure she is. Later, the girls arrive at their shoot. Since there are 12 of them left, they will each represent a sign of the Zodiac. Not only that, but it will be made into a calendar! There will be a stunt coordinator on hand to help them, since they will be lifted into the air for this shoot. Sounds interesting!

The first girl up is Naima, and she is Capricorn, the goat. Jay thought that being a dancer, she would have better movement. I’m a Naima fan, but I don’t think this was the shoot for her. Kahlen is Aires, the ram. She looks great, but has some problems with balance. Noelle is up next, and she is Leo, the lion. I like the makeup, but I don’t think she was very flexible for the shoot. Neither does Jay.

Keenyah is the next girl to go, and she is Taurus, the bull. Everything looks good. Brittany is Sagittarius, and after she is finished, Jay tells her that there was nothing hootchie about her shot. That’s always a good thing.

Okay, let me start by saying that I love Tiffany. This is now my favorite part of this episode. Tiffany says to Brandy, in these exact words: “I’m Cancer, why I gotta be a skrimp?” Brandy replies “I wish I was a skrimp!” Could someone clarify what a skrimp is to me? I almost died! Anyway, Tiffany is the next to get her shot done, and she realizes she is a crab, not a “skrimp.” She’s very concentrated during her shoot, and Jay thinks she is making leaps and bounds. Christina goes next, and she is Libra, representing scales. I’m not a fan of her get-up. Tatiana is Gemini, and since I’m a Gemini, I hope she doesn’t get eliminated. Is that wrong?

Brandy is now getting upset because she doesn’t think the photographer knows what to do with her hair since it’s so short. Uh-oh, she’s getting impatient! Rebecca goes next though, and she’s Virgo, the virgin. She doesn’t look like a virgin. Michelle represents Aquarius and it seems like everyone loves her shot, including me! Lluvy is supposed to be Pisces, the fish. It’s not pretty, and I’ll leave it at that.

In the holding room, Tiffany tells the camera that Brandy has a right to get upset. When you are around girls that have a big mouth, like Tatiana, you are going to get upset. She feels that Brandy is sweet most of the time, but only has an attitude when she feels like someone is attacking her. At this point, we see Brandy taking her photo as Scorpio, the scorpion. I love her makeup. Jay wants more from her though. As Brandy finishes, she heads to the holding room, knowing that people are talking about her.

Fighting erupts in the back room with Tatiana and Brandy again. Naima knows that it’s petty to be fighting, as Tiffany comes to Brandy’s defense. She feels that she has to protect Brandy, and won’t let people to continue to come at her with negativity. Tatiana proclaims that it’s over, as Tiffany says that she has a new strategy, and it revolves around her being herself, so people can take it or leave it. Naima seems to respect this, and tells the camera that Tiffany can be very motherly at times. The girls get Tyra mail and it says someone is going home tomorrow. Brandy just knows that with so few girls left, the fakeness will show.

Tyra welcomes the girls into the judging room. It’s time for the third cut. She introduces them to the judges, along with special guest judge, Beverley Johnson. Tyra also reminds the girls of the prizes, then tells them that their individual evaluation test this week will be the shots that were taken at the “Tennis shoot.” Oh great, this should be good!

Michelle is the first girl to go, and although they don’t like her tennis shots, they are thrilled with her Zodiac shot. Naima looks good in her tennis shots, but opposite in her Zodiac shot. Tatiana is over the top in her tennis shots, but she looks hot as hell in her Gemini shot – and I’m not just saying that. It really does look good, and I’m not a huge Tatiana fan. Brittany is told that she looks great in her Zodiac shot, and doesn’t resemble a porn goddess at all.

Brandy is the next girl up, and the judges ask her if she is sad. She says no, and Tyra remarks that she was so bubbly in the audition round. They aren’t happy with her tennis shots, and are split with her Zodiac shot. Keenyah has a great profile in her tennis shots, and her Zodiac shot is the bomb. Kahlen is told that she lacks confidence, and it shows in her photos. However, they are a fan of her Aries shot. Christina is told that she looks cramped, and resembles a girl getting botox, which Janice confirms since she’s had so much.

Noelle steps up and the judges tell her to fix her hair. They aren’t a fan of any of her shots this week. Tiffany tells the judges that she didn’t want to whack the photographer, but if it was the Tiffany from six months ago, it would have happened. They aren’t fans of her tennis shots, but they think her Cancer shot was great considering that she had to work with huge claws on. Skrimps have claws? Lluvy goes next, and her Pisces shot doesn’t hit it off. Everyone thinks she looks like a dead fish, and I have to agree. It’s NOT a good shot at all. Rebecca is the last to go, and Tyra says she is back and strong. They like her tennis shots, but feel her Virgo shot is very pedestrian. It’s alright, but I’m not raving about it. In the midst of all this though, Tyra admits to not being a virgin. What is going on here tonight?

Time for the judges to deliberate. They feel that Tatiana is new, but has potential. Michelle looks like Jay Leno, according to Jay, while Keenyah has a great face. Rebecca is just alright, and Lluvy is good in person, but Tyra says that her shot this week was the worst in Top Model history. Hmm, it just might be. I think that’s an article! The judges see some progression with Brittany, and although Brandy has an exotic look, Nigel says that she looks like death warmed up.

The judges feel that Naima was off this week, and if Noelle could transform, she could be hot. Kahlen is too insecure, but could get self esteem in the long run. Tiffany is strong and nailed the shot, while Christina finally had some great shots of her own. This is going to be tough.

The girls walk back into the room. Tyra says that there are 12 girls, but she only has 11 photos. Those photos are the girls that will continue on. The first girl called is Brittney, who is told that she went from a XXX queen to queen of the galaxy. Good for Brittany! I like her. She is followed by Keenyah, Michelle and Kahlen, who is told that her confidence is slowly growing. Christina is called next, followed by Rebecca, Tatiana, Naima and Tiffany, and who Tyra tells is very beautiful.

There are only three girls left, as Noelle is the next girl called. She starts crying right away, and Tyra tells her that she has to listen, or she will leave the same way she showed up. This leaves us with Lluvy and Brandy, who both step up. Tyra says only one girl will move on, while the other must go back to the loft and pack her bags immediately. She says that one girl has an attitude with a capital A, and she’s not sure It can be fixed in 12 weeks. The other girl has only taken one good photo, and the one she took this week was the worst in Top Model history. I can’t believe she said it out loud! Ha! Tyra tells them that the judges feel one has more potential than the other. That person… is Lluvy! Brandy is sent packing, and doesn’t even say goodbye to the other girls, as we see Tiffany crying.

Brandy says she doesn’t regret anything that happened while she was there, and if the judges could look past her attitude, they would see what a great person she is. I hope she’s watching this show. She writes Tiffany, and only Tiffany, a goodbye note. Brandy then tells the camera that she never had a big sister, but always wanted one. Tiffany is her big sister. Aww!

Next week, looks like Michelle has some kind of problem with her face that might be contagious. Keenyah think sit might be a flesh eating virus, as the girls worry that they will get it too. Will Michelle’s face be fierce, or fatal? I don’t know, do you? Here’s how I rank the girls from here. See ya next week, my skrimp friend!

• Naima
• Keenyah
• Rebecca
• Tiffany
• Christina
• Tatiana
• Kahlen
• Michelle
• Brittany
• Noelle (Even though I love her)
• Lluvy

Phil Kural is a recent graduate from Temple University, with a degree in journalism. You can reach him at pkural@gmail.com with any feedback that you may have.

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