The Casino, Episode 4: Psychic Friend

Tim and Tom, our heroes, are headed to their hearing in front of the Nevada gaming association. Tim is a nervous wreck, wondering if they’ll be grilled about possible Mafia ties. Who are Tim and Tom? Tim describes them as “made guys… self-made guys.” What’s their story? Tim fills us in.

It’s 9:22 in the morning, and Tim, clad only in a bathrobe, is eating breakfast when Tom arrives to get him ready for work. Do they live in the same apartment building? And did I really need to see that much Tim Poster flesh? Oh, well – I should be glad I’m not seeing it first thing in the morning like poor Tom is. Tim says that Tom drives so slowly that he might as well leave for work now, and he’ll still catch up to him after he finishes breakfast. Tom says nuh-uh, and Tim responds yeah-huh, so the two of them bet $5,000 on who will make it to work first. Tim says of that amount of money, “That’s chicken feed, man.” He’s confident he’ll win because Tom hasn’t won one of their bets since roughly 1986. Tom takes the bet, but says no speeding. The two of them hop into their cars and race to work. At one point, a shot of Tim’s speedometer reveals that he’s driving well over 80 miles per hour. In the end, Tim wins, screeching into the hotel seconds before Tom.

This scene succeeds mainly in making me hate Tim and Tom, which is not such a good thing since they’re the main characters on the show. When Tim called $5,000 “chicken feed,” I just wanted to slap him. What a pompous idiot. And the two of them are sickeningly irresponsible for driving recklessly down busy roads to win a juvenile bet. Someone could have been hurt or killed because these two jokers thought it would be fun to place a bet on driving fast.

The men walk into the casino, and Tim sees Tommy, the blackjack dealer who’s dreaming of working as a host. Tim apologizes to him for missing their meeting, and asks Tommy to set something up with his secretary so they can meet. Tommy is thrilled.

Friends Eulisha and Joan are headed to Vegas, ready to win some money. Eulisha is wearing a jacket made out of what appears to be Muppet fur, and she says that she wants to win enough money to pay off her Porsche. The car is her baby, but the monthly payments are killing her. They arrive at the Golden Nugget, and Eulisha makes a point of telling the valet to take very good care of her baby.

Next, Brian, his wife Feleisha, and their two sons arrive for a family vacation. Luck is on their side right away – the room they requested isn’t available, but they do have an upgrade for them. Yay! Brian explains to us in an interview that his kids wanted to go to Disney on vacation, but he and his wife decided to go to Vegas first to win money to pay for the Disney vacation. Well, that’s a solid plan. What could go wrong with that? Plus, I’m sure the kids will have an absolute blast sitting around the hotel room while their parents gamble, since they’re under 18 and thus can’t go on the casino floor. They head up to their suite, and Feleisha loves it. They check out the view, and Brian says he feels like a high roller. I’m not sure why he would, because the view, like the view the high rollers had last week, seems to be of a parking lot.

Tommy, looking good in a suit, rushes past his evil boss Monique on his way to meet with Tim. Monique wants to know why he’s so dressed up, and he says he’ll tell her later. She makes him promise he’ll be back in time to work that night. Tommy heads for the elevator, nervous about his meeting with Tim. He seems to have a little scrap of paper in his pocket with notes on what he wants to say. Aww, don’t you just want to hug him? Tommy meets Tim and tells him that he’d love to be a host someday, though he knows that at 23, he’s awfully young for the job. Tim says that his age might not matter, if he’s good at what he does. He offers Tommy the chance to intern as a host, but says that it’ll have to be on his own time, and cannot interfere with his job as a dealer. Tim says he’ll talk to Tommy’s father John, who is a host, to arrange for Tommy to shadow someone. Tommy is very excited, and as soon as he walks out of the meeting, calls his dad on his cell phone with the good news.

Monique, on the other hand, is furious, because Tommy is eight minutes late for work. Tommy apologizes and explains that he was in a meeting with Tim. He tells her that he’s going to be interning as a host. Monique is really snotty about it and implies that he’s only being considered for the position because of his dad. That might be true, but it’s awfully rude to say so in front of Tommy. Tommy insists that he’s gotten the job on his own merits, but Monique isn’t buying it, especially when Tommy admits that his dad introduced him to Tim in the first place.

In an interview, Tommy says that Monique has worked for the casino for 12 years, and he’s only been there for five months, so if he got this promotion, he’d be leapfrogging over her. Monique makes some more snarky comments, these about how young Tommy is. Monique, he gets it. Find a new hobby. Tommy vows to stay focused on his job as a dealer, but admits to us that he’s kind of enjoying Monique’s jealousy.

Seconds after he says he’s going to focus, Tommy accidentally deals too many hands of blackjack. To make matters worse, it happens in front of Monique, the pit boss, and his dad. Tommy is embarrassed and apologizes to everyone.

Eulisha and Joan hit the spa to work out, and Eulisha notices that another woman there is wearing a t-shirt that says “Psychic Girl” on it. The two of them strike up a conversation, and Eulisha learns that the woman, Justine, is indeed a psychic. Justine agrees to do a reading for her. She says that Eulisha should play roulette, and that the numbers four and seven look lucky. She won’t be able to pay off her car just yet, but says she sees her making some new connections for her singing career. Eulisha is happy to hear that.

Tim reminds Tom that he owes him $5,000. Tom offers to bet him $5,000 for a 100-yard dash, which is hilarious. Tim says that Tom is really tight with his money, adding, “The guy’s got $100,000,000 and he’s worried about $5,000.” Hey, Tim, if you’re not worried about such chump change, then why do you keep asking Tom for it? And since it is just chump change, how about showing some love to the woman who tirelessly recaps your show? You can find my email address at the end of this article.

Brian teaches Feleisha how to play roulette as the kids watch. He says in an interview that he discourages his children from gambling. Yes, I can tell by the fine example you’re setting here, Brian. Especially when he tells his youngest son that he’s going to make enough money for them to buy Disneyland. He and Feleisha head downstairs to the casino, and tell the boys to stay in the room. Wow, what a great vacation for the kids! It’s like being grounded in a whole new room!

As soon as the parents leave, the older boy calls room service and orders an array of desserts while the younger one jumps on the bed. I can’t say I blame them.

Brian and Feleisha head to the roulette table, and Brian starts losing right away. Eulisha joins the table and immediately wins on four. She wins again on seven and is delighted. She tells Brian and Feleisha about Justine and how she told her which numbers to play. Just then, who should arrive but Justine? The two women greet each other warmly, but Brian says he doesn’t believe in psychics. Still, he’s impressed by the results and wants a reading of his own. He takes Justine’s card.

Upstairs, the two boys play roulette until room service arrives. The cart is stocked up with cookies, ice cream, milkshakes, cheesecake, and apple pie. The boys gorge themselves, then agree that their parents never need to know about this little escapade. Right, not until they pay their room bill, that is. Or, you know, flip on their TV’s. Anyway, the boys sneak out into the hallway, ditch the cart on the elevator, and run back to their room.

It’s the first day of Tommy’s internship. John, his dad, decides he should shadow another host, called Grey Dog, so that people won’t suspect nepotism (that is, not any more than they already do). That day, Grey Dog is keeping an eye on a regular customer named Steve. Steve is completely hammered, and Tommy says in an interview that under normal circumstances, someone as loud and drunk as he is would probably get kicked out, but because Steve spends so much money, he has a host with him all day instead.

Grey Dog and Tommy take Steve to a blackjack tournament and have him sit down in the hopes that he’ll calm down a bit. Steve tells Tommy to sit in his lap, and Tommy politely declines. Grey Dog leaves for a moment, putting Tommy in charge. Tommy says it’s like watching his three-year-old brother. Finally, Steve joins the blackjack tournament, and he’s still a drunken mess, whopping and hollering at every card that’s played. Grey Dog tells Tommy that he needs to learn how to juggle the needs of a guy like Steve with those of the other guests. At the end of the day, Tommy says it was a humbling experience, and realizes that hosting is harder than he thought.

Justine meets with Brian, and starts the reading by telling him he’s an old spirit, but he has her cut to the chase: which numbers should he bet on. She says seven looks good, but adds that a female presence is keeping him from focusing on his gambling. She says that she sees Disney down the road for his family, but that they won’t be going any time soon.

Finally, we get to the good part: my TV boyfriend Matt Dusk! Hi, Matt! Eulisha thinks he’s great, and says, “He is so hot. He’s not just hot, he’s so hot.” From my couch, I’m like, “Yeah, I know,” but then she goes on to say, “I mean, sizzlin’, like the meat has burned,” at which point I tell her to stay away from my man. She doesn’t listen, due to the fact that she’s on my television and not in my living room, and introduces herself to Matt. She says she’s a singer too, so Matt decides to embrace entertainment director Joe’s penchant for karaoke by inviting her to sing with him. He likes her right away and thinks she’ll be great.

Brian heads downstairs to gamble some more, and has a new system to play, which includes not standing next to Feleisha. Feleisha actually seems to believe that she is indeed hurting his luck. The number seven never does come up, and Brian says that he should have known he wasn’t going to win, since Justine didn’t see a family trip to Disney any time soon.

On stage, Eulisha tears up “Amazing Grace.” She sounds fantastic, and Matt admits that he hates to follow her. He jokes that he may have just lost his gig to her, but figures at least the person he put on stage to sing actually has a decent voice. Later, Matt’s agent asks Eulisha to record some vocal tracks for her. Eulisha heads out of Vegas, her car not paid off, but her career prospects richer. She tells Joan she had a great time.

The next morning, Brian breaks the news to his kids that he lost again and they won’t be going to Disneyland for a while. He takes the family to the Stratosphere to make it up to them. There’s a really high roller coaster that consists pretty much of making you feel like you’re going to fall off the top of this very high tower. Feleisha is all over that, and convinces their older son to go on it with her, even though he doesn’t want to. He screams and covers his eyes, yelling, “Get me down!” The family heads off, and Brian promises them they’ll go to Disney some day. Well, I’m sure that going on a totally unfun family vacation and learning all about gambling will be just as happy a memory for the kids.

Tommy is dealing, and his friend Alexis comes to the table. He says he’s known her since high school. He explains, “She’s not officially my girlfriend. You know, I’ve tagged her a few times, but if that’s considered dating, then I guess I am dating her.” Wow, what a sweet talker! I bet once Alexis sees this show, Tommy will be able to pretty much forget about “tagging” her ever again. As she plays, he gives her advice on when to hit, which Monique notices. Monique says that dealing to your girlfriend is against Golden Nugget policy, “and now they want to make him a host.”

Meanwhile, Tommy compliments Alexis’s necklace, then says he was looking at that, not at her cleavage. Classy! Monique reports Tommy for dealing to Alexis, and she leaves before Monique can get to the table. Still, the pit boss arrives and asks Tommy if Alexis is his girlfriend. Tommy wisely doesn’t tell him about tagging her, and says no. But it doesn’t matter – Tommy needs to meet with Dee later.

Zack, Tim and Tom’s assistant, feeds the dog while Tim pesters Tom again for his money. Tom says he’ll have it in eight to ten days. He adds that Tim’s been really high-strung lately and needs to relax. Amen, brother. Tom tells Tim about the psychic that’s been around lately, and Tim wonders if she’s hustling the guests. Tom says no, that she just seems to be a guest, and because Justine is crucial to two plot points this week, the guys decide they’d like to meet her.

Tommy meets with Dee and says that Alexis isn’t his girlfriend, but Dee doesn’t believe him. He can’t believe Tommy would go against company policy “for a piece of tail.” Is talking about women that way encouraged or discouraged in Golden Nugget company policy? Just wondering. Dee says he’s tempted to fire Tommy on the spot. He says he won’t tell Tim what happened out of respect for Tommy’s dad, but he will be fired if Tommy ever steps out of line again. Tommy is in shock.

Justine arrives to meet Tim and Tom. Tim says he’s a skeptic, and Justine says she doesn’t care if he believes her or not. He gives her permission to read him. He says he’s considering a risky business venture, which is news to Tom, even though Tim says he would include Tom in the deal. Justine says he’ll back out of the deal at the last minute. Tom asks her if Tim will ever slow down. She says not for a long time, and predicts he’ll calm down when he’s 53. She doesn’t think his job is giving him any health risks at the moment, and Tom is glad to hear it.

She leaves, and Tim says he doesn’t believe a word of it. He asks again about his money, and Tom convinces him to play a hand of gin, double or nothing, for the cash. Tim then eats some leftover food of Tom’s, which appears to be sour cream or something. I don’t know; it’s kind of weird.

With that, the episode ends, so now it’s time for this week’s recounting of unlikely/ridiculous events from the show. First of all, were we really to believe that Tim and Tom’s race to work was spontaneous, and that the producers just happened to have cameras in helicopters to get all of those aerial shots, just in case? And wasn’t it an interesting coincidence that Eulisha met Justine? And that then Eulisha met Brian, and just as they were talking about Justine, she showed up? As for Justine, her predictions were pretty vague. How many times did Eulisha win on four and seven, and how many times did she lose? What kind of dad takes his underage kids on vacation to Las Vegas and leaves them alone in a hotel room for big chunks of time? Would Tim and Tom really have found out about Justine just because she gave some fairly worthless advice to two casino patrons (after all, Eulisha didn’t make enough money to pay off her car)?

More troubling, though, about the show is the fact that there is basically no one to root for. Tim and Tom are kind of boobs. I don’t like them and I really don’t care if they’re successful. Tommy seems like a nice guy, but he’s awfully immature, and seems to be his own worst enemy. The other people we’ve seen in the casino have hardly had enough camera time to make any impact, and the guests they feature tend to be pretty obnoxious. The only one to love is, of course, my boyfriend Matt Dusk. Luckily I love Matt – and my loyal readers – enough to keep recapping the show!

Next week’s episode should be a good one, because it features my boyfriend Matt Dusk, the only likeable character on the show! Matt wants to be in the showroom, and thinks Tim might make it happen for him. Plus, Tom gets some scantily clad showgirls on the casino floor. Did I mention that this episode features Matt?

Betsy is the Associate Editor of RealityNewsOnline and can be reached with any comments at betsyw42@hotmail.com.

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