The Apprentice 5, Episode 12: Marry Me, Ivanka

We start off this episode of The Apprentice where we left off: in the boardroom. Michael gets fired. Back in the suite, Roxanne says that she’s antsy. Tammy says Lee’s won twice as PM. They wonder if Trump will fire all three of them. They should be so lucky! But on this show, you never know. Sean and Lee return to the suite. The women quickly put together that Michael’s gone. Lee says he never lost before as PM. He thinks Trump must like him. They all toast the final five.

The candidates arrive in the showroom of the Trump watch collection, which Trump does a pretty weak job of tying into the task. The candidates will be creating a display for the Xbox 360 for Wal-Mart stores. They’re to create an interactive, 3-D in store environment with the X-Box 360. The two executives – Jay from Microsoft and Steve from Wal-Mart- will choose a winner.

Sean and Lee hit Wal-Mart and are all excited about the project. Sean is project manager and says his juices were flowing. Ivanka comes in and says hello. Sean says he wants to target more than just gamers. Lee interrupts and describes the display to Ivanka. She likes the idea and thinks they’re working well as a team. Can they bring it together?

Sean meets with two men who will build the display for them. One of them, Adrien, will make a graphic for the floor, along with a ceiling above it. The other guy will make a wraparound wall that will go from the floor to the ceiling. Lee says both pieces fit together “like a puzzle.” Sean and Lee outsourced everything, figuring they’d hire the best. Lee says he’s totally confident they’ll win the task. Oh, Lee. Never say that!

And now for the Trump Lesson Of The Week: “Death To Traitors.” If there’s sabotage from within, get rid of the people you suspect, and fast. And now for the Betsy Lesson of the Week: It’s allergy season, so keep a box of tissues in your car or you’ll end up blowing your nose on an ancient scratchy Starbucks napkin.

Synergy checks out their space. Tammy is the project manager. She’s imagining a red carpet theme to show other things that are compatible and to highlight entertainment. “People love entertainment,” she says. It’s a fairly insipid statement; I’ve heard that most people also enjoy fun. Tammy imagines “a make your own awards show.” She says people won’t even want to leave their houses, everything is so great. Roxanne doesn’t like the theme, but doesn’t offer any other suggestions. Allie suggests that Roxanne handle graphics. The three women wander around the store looking for supplies for their display. Tammy wants to hang mirros to make it bigger. Roxanne rolls her eyes. They put it on the “maybe” list and Roxanne says “Maybe if you’re good, Santa Claus will bring it to you.” Wow, condescending! Bill arrives, and Tammy explains the concept to him. In an interview, Bill says Allie keeps shooting him looks as if to imply that Tammy is a moron. He’s not impressed. Bill says they should be working as a team, trying to win. After Bill leaves, Tammy wants to show the other two something and they giggle over the wet floor sign. Tammy says they’re being “really high school” as she nervously gnaws a cuticle. Why am I hit with a sudden urge to watch Mean Girls?

Gold Rush eats at the Wal-Mart food court. They are enthusiastic about how things are going to go. They just have to wait for the signage people to put things together. They’re happy because things are going so smoothly. Lee says the two of them are in the honeymoon stage. Sean says they have a lot different. He’s 11 years older than Lee, he’s from England, Lee’s from New York, Lee’s Jewish, and he’s half Arab. Still, they work well together. He adores Lee.

Roxanne says she hates the layout. Tammy asks her when the banners will be ready. Roxanne doesn’t know. Roxanne then tells Allie that Tammy glared at her. Roxanne says Tammy is a stress case and doesn’t listen unless you agree with her. Tammy is clearly at wit’s end and gathers the other to the display and asks the what they’d like to do. She says she’s really frustrated and feels disrespected. Roxanne says it’s unfair, but Tammy has seen the eye rolling. Both of them deny it. Allie and Roxanne clarify in interviews the many things they do with their eyes other than rolling. It is such crap. Allie says in her interview that her “raised eyebrows” (not to be confused with rolled eyes) were called for. Tammy says she wants to prove herself. She wants it to be about her. Allie says that’s going to come back to bite her. If this team loses, it’s going to be ugly.

Sean gets a call from one of the sign guys. He says “probably” he can be ready at 7:00 the next morning. He had promised midnight, so Sean is freaking out. They can’t do anything until he gets the floor. Lee gets on the phone with him and has no success. Sean begs him to do his best to get it done. Ooh. Maybe they shouldn’t have spent so much time enjoying the fine cuisine of the Wal-Mart snack bar.

Gold Rush has 2-1/2 hours to go. They set up cameras and mp3 players for Wal-Mart, but really they’re waiting for the floor. Adrien arrives and sets up the floor graphics, which look awesome. The guys are thrilled until they get the news that it will take about two hours to put up the top and ½ hour to install. Sean begs him to move fast. In an interview, he says his fate lies in Adrien’s hands.

Synergy has 1-1/2 hours to go. Tammy says that Wal-Mart is full of signs, so they need a good one. Roxanne’s sign is way too small. Roxanne admits it may have been too simple, but “ultimately, I got the sign delivered, so I don’t want to hear [naughty word] about signs.” Wow, I remember when I used to like Roxanne. Her refusing to take responsibility for the task delegated to her is not winning her any points with me.

Sean calls and begs Adrien to come with a blank ceiling, no matter if it’s wet. Lee wants to start working on anything they can do. Lee puts up the wrap with tubes and duct tape. Sean says if Adrien shows up, “keep him away from me.”

Synergy’s display looks nice. It’s got black drapes from floor to ceiling. Inside are chairs for lounging, plus big screened TVs showing what the Xbox can do. Tammy says that the vision and layout are all hers. She tells the executives that it’s an entertainment theme, showcasing the X-box as an award winning project. The setting is comfortable and not too high tech. It’s hard to read what the executives think.

Gold Rush looks pretty junky. The wrap, which the guys put up with duct tape and a whole lot of hope, is really sagging. There are exposed wires everywhere. The inside, though, looks pretty cool. Everything is branded with the Xbox look. They not only have the big TVs, they also have a bunch of other compatible projects. Sean is not happy at all with how things look, but they push on. Jay from Microsoft thinks it’s a bit crowded. Sean says it could be bigger. After the presentation ends, Adrien shows up with the roof. Lovely!

The teams arrive at Microsoft to meet their fate. Ivanka and Bill can’t wait to see how this plays out. They both have strong opinions. Trump asks how everybody did. Sean says that they missed the mark in implementation. Allie is now more confident hearing what Sean had to say. Ouch.

The executives start with the women. Synergy’s environment is inviting, a great hangout. The problem is, it’s not a place to make a high-end purchase. Nothing grabbed you or pulled it together – no price points, etc. Gold Rush looked unfinished, but they created a retail-friendly environment, showed prices and products, and was shop-able. They agree that it worked. Despite Gold Rush’s execution, they win.

I’m really happy with this outcome. It shows that Jay and Steve had some vision. Even though Gold Rush’s project wasn’t quite finished, they were able to see how strong it would have been if they’d had just a little more time. Tammy’s display was attractive, but had too soft a sell, especially in an environment like Wal-Mart, which is not exactly known for its subtlety.

For their reward, Sean and Lee will take a private jet to California to audition their voices for the movie Over the Hedge. And, away they go! Sean thinks that British people in cartoons tend to be evil. They arrive at Dreamworks. Jeffrey Katzenberg greets them. Sean says he has both creativity and business acumen. They preview the movie, which they love. Then, they audition for bit parts in the movie. Lee is not too good. Sean isn’t much better, but says he was feeling the part. Still, they will have tiny parts in the movie. They both loved the opportunity.

Synergy hangs out at the suite and is really jealous of the reward. Allie says she loves Tammy, but someone has to go. It was Tammy’s vision. In an interview, she says Tammy was the PM and made it all about her, so there’s no choice. Roxanne says Tammy wants it to be her show. She’s not sure if Tammy will fight or not. Allie hopes it’ll be clean. Roxanne says that based on “the world according to Tammy,” it won’t be. Tammy thinks Roxanne did a terrible job with the signs. Did she sabotage her? Has she been riding Allie’s coattails?

Synergy arrives in the boardroom. Tammy says she wanted to be project manager again to gain his respect. Allie says she was a good project manager in terms of operations, but lost the big picture. Roxanne thinks this was a hard task for them because of Tammy’s leadership. Tammy says she felt strongly about her vision and was disappointed that it wasn’t successful. She wanted an entertainment theme and a sense of excitement. Trump says it looked like a cheap third rate liquor lounge. Sounds like the kind of place Simon Cowell would claim a bad American Idol auditioner might find success.

Tammy wanted a place where people might hang out, say husbands dragged to Wal-Mart with their wives. Trump says it was hard to find the price of anything. Tammy blames herself for that. But she couldn’t count on her team to execute what she had to do. Roxanne was in charge of signage and says she did what Tammy asked. She repeats that Tammy said the project was all about her. Roxanne says that Tammy walked off and ignored her. Tammy says she got nothing from either of them. Allie smirks and looks disapproving as hard as she can while Roxanne and Tammy argue. Roxanne says that they all choke sometimes. Trump disagrees. Tammy says the other two gossip all the time.

Ivanka says that Allie has been rolling her eyes and not saying anything. Does she have something to say? Because now is the time to say it. Marry me, Ivanka. That was seriously one of the most awesome lines in the show ever. I totally love her for calling Allie on that passive crap. Ivanka is awesome.

Allie denies it, but Ivanka says it is what she’s been doing. Bill says that Allie rolled her eyes at him and it really rubbed him the wrong way. Allie apologizes first to Bill, then, almost as an afterthought, to Tammy. Ivanka says that Tammy takes things personally. Trump says he takes things personally too, and holds grudges. Ivanka says that’s true. Trump says not to worry about it.

Tammy says Roxanne was the worst. She brings Allie down. Allie and Roxanne disagree. Roxanne says she’s a straight shooter. Trump says she doesn’t get along with others- such as Tammy. Roxanne thinks Tammy is attacking them. Bill says it’s the opposite- the others are attacking Tammy.

The fabulous Ivanka says Allie’s not saying anything- what was Allie’s involvement? Ivanka is unclear as to what Allie contributed- positive or negative- to the task. Man, do I love Ivanka. At this point, my husband suggests that maybe Ivanka would like to live in our guest room. She could just follow us around, suggest ways that we might be more efficient, and make really intelligent statements, all while wearing fabulous clothes.

Allie repeats that it was Tammy’s vision. Trump asks Allie who’s better- Roxanne or Tammy. Bill laughs at it, since we all know what her answer will be. Of course, Allie picks Roxanne, but says she’s friends with both of them. Roxanne says that Tammy is using her as a target because she wasn’t a yes man. Allie’s more diplomatic, Roxanne says. Tammy says Roxanne is riding Allie’s coattails. Roxanne points to her record as PM. The two yell over each other. Trump says it’s enough. Tammy agrees both of her opponents are tough. Have they teamed up on her because of lack of leadership? Tammy is 1-3 as PM, but argues that at least she stepped up. She says she’s not over her head and remained calm despite not having support. Trump says she didn’t have control over her team and wasn’t respected. Allie blinks hard. Roxanne says that she wanted them to make the final four. But Tammy wanted the project to be all about her. Ugh, no she didn’t! She wanted it to be about her, meaning that she wanted her team to work with her to carry out her vision. Since her team failed to help her at all, it didn’t end up being about her at all.

Trump says that they missed the mark with lousy design. Tammy says she wanted other suggestions and got nothing better. Trump says she was a bad leader with bad design. Tammy is fired. I wait patiently for him to fire the other two while he’s at it, but no such luck. Allie says “no more eye rolls” as she leaves, and Trump kicks her out of the boardroom. Thanks, Trump! Tammy puts on her beautiful green coat and leaves. Trump thinks it was a tough decision and Ivanka and Bill pretend to agree.

Tammy is disappointed that she didn’t make it farther. Maybe she didn’t have a big enough personality. She’s a problem solver, not a problem creator. She thinks Allie and Roxanne will crash and burn in a non-sales related task.

Honestly, I would have been happy if all three of them had been fired this week. Tammy was the one who came up with the ineffective idea. Although it looked pretty, it really was a bad design for the task they had in mind- so bad that they lost to a display with visible wires and duct tape. But instead of offering better options or contributing anything helpful whatsoever, Allie and Roxanne made snide comments about Tammy and the project and rolled their eyes. Oh, I’m sorry- “raised eyebrows” and “pointed my eyes in an upward direction.” Roxanne’s signs were all wrong, and what did Allie do again? I have no idea. I guess now I’m rooting for Sean, but truly, the only person I’m really cheering for now is Ivanka.

I’ll see you next week for the final four!

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