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Survivor: One World Roundtable Predictions Update, Episode 7 – Curses!by Ken Kellam III -- 04/02/2011
Every season, the writers at RNO attempt to assess the chances of the latest Survivor cast. Our mission, should we decide to accept it: Predict the pre-jury boots, finalists, and ultimately, the winner. So how did we fare in regards to Jonas? Suffice it to say this one is a bit tricky. We were charged to select eight players to miss the jury, but only six players did. Therefore, anyone who picks Jonas and the person ousted next to miss the jury will still get credit for a correct pick, but if there’s a tie at the end, the point will go to whomever had the seventh and eights evictees in the jury. This week, four of us had Jonas getting an early exit. Only one of us had seated him in the jury, while three poor souls had him as a finalist. With that, let’s take a look at the latest standings, with comments to follow:
As is the tradition, let’s start from the bottom. Chris has watched his season go from bad to worse to complete disaster. After starting the season at 2-0, he has lost five straight, and this week he becomes the first writer to lose all three finalists, as he had picked Jonas picked to finish third. Chris, if I remember correctly, Colton knocked out the other two people you picked to go to the end. Well, at least I can't blame Colton for knocking out this finalist. Maybe I can blame Kim instead. Naw, she's too pretty. She can get away with anything. (Call me, Kim!)Chris, it’s a good thing you’re not actually playing the game with Kim or she’d have you wrapped around her little finger. Okay, go on. Seriously, once again I pick someone to go far, and he or she is eliminated because he or she is too dangerous. Colton might have disliked Bill personally, but others seemed to recognize that his personality could prove problematic to their own chances of winning down the road. Colton saw that Monica was dangerous after a merge and took her out. And now everybody loves Jonas ... And that's exactly why he has to go.To be fair, in any other season, those three probably would’ve at least made the jury. But the fact that three players as strong as your finalists are already out shows you how atypical this season is. Seventh place Sarah’s week wasn’t much better. Not only did she lose her second finalist with Jonas’s demise, she lost her winner as well. Sarah, care to lament your fate? When I picked Jonas to win, I said that it was based on the type of player I wanted him to be, and he did turn out to be that type of player: unassuming, but strategic and self-aware. I'm genuinely sorry to see him go because I would have loved to see how he handled himself towards the endgame. I feel like he got shafted by the tribal swap and then by how the reward challenge split the tribe, and I'll be sulking over that for a while. Turns out that the sane, quiet guy in a group of misfits does stand out as the biggest threat. That may well be yet another indication of how unpredictable this season has been. Between tribes going to Tribal Council when they didn’t need to, one of the game’s more strategic (if obnoxious) players being evacuated, and some of the strongest players being ousted early, this season has been unusual in more ways than one. In sixth place is David, who gets a point despite pegging Jonas for a pre-jury boot, and thus he becomes the only writer with a winning record. Unfortunately, two of his previous losses were finalists, with one being his winner. Tied for third place are Jenn, Jeffrey, and William, who all got a point. However, it should be noted that William was the only writer out of the eight of us to forecast accurately Jonas’ jury spot. How do you feel about this William? I'm both happy and sad at this result. I'm happy because in my original thought process, I knew he was on the bubble for the jury, and I had just enough confidence to put him through. In an ideal world a guy like Jonas would win, but I just had this nagging feeling that the ideal would not come to pass this time out. Following that last point, the reason I'm sad is because this is an indicator of how disappointing this season is becoming. As I moaned last week, at this rate we're looking at Kim as our winner. Could this have been a more wasted season?You’ve got a point. Some of the more interesting players, such as Nina and Monica, were probably ousted way too early, and I know how much you hated the evacuation of Colton, your winner. In fact, you, Jenn, and Jeffrey have all seen your winners leave in the last three episodes, be it due to Tribal Council or evacuation. Before this week, Jenn was the only writer to have all her finalists intact, which was all the more ironic given that she made all her picks via a randomizer. At least the randomizer gave her one week alone at the top. Jenn was so thrilled she offered the blasted thing a cookie. Apparently, it didn’t like the flavor and spit the cookie back out at Jenn this week as she, like Sarah, had Jonas winning it all. So, who’s on – or rather in – first? That would be Yours Truly and Stinger in a tie. At this point, it should be noted that a couple of weeks ago, RNO editor David lamented the loss of two finalists, including his winner, and said his only hope was for the rest of us to do as poorly as he was. Since then, four players have seen their winner leave, and only Stinger and I still have ours in the running. Jeffrey, how do you feel about this turn of events? David's hoodoo curse strikes again.As a matter of – Um, excuse me, what’s that sound I hear? Apparently an evil laugh echoes through the halls of Reality News Online, and it sounds a lot like David. Jeffrey, I see a look of fear in your eyes. Does anybody know of a counter-curse to protect Michael and Troyzan, the predicted winners of Stinger and Ken? And, if not, is the curse so out of control it is going to run the gauntlet on the second and third place predictions as well?Well, David, how about it? There is no way to counter it, unless you have an immunity idol. If you only knew the power of the dark side of the Force.Sarah, last week you mentioned that curse, and asked that someone pour some holy water on Jonas, your winner – to no avail. This is what I get for working for an evil overlord. Oh, well, Jenn, we had a good run while it lasted. Plainly, Holy Water is no use against this curse, so Ken and Stinger my advice to you is to find a Jedi Knight, stat. I’m working on it as we speak. By the way, if what Jeffrey says comes true, and all the projected finalists are wiped out, we’ll be treated to a final of Tarzan, Chelsea, and Sabrina. Of course, it may be somewhat entertaining to hear Tarzan stumble through questions in the final Tribal Council. Let’s address Tarzan’s behavior back at camp. When he interfered with Chelsea’s quest for clean clothes did anyone else have flashbacks to the first season, when B.B. washed his t-shirt in the tribal pot? Was Chelsea overreacting or was she justified? If Tarzan was smart, he would’ve respected her wishes, if for no other reason than to avoid making an enemy. But having said that, what can we make of Chelsea’s comment that she’s all about who deserves to be there? I can’t believe that after 20+ seasons of the show someone actually feels that way. At this stage of the game, “deserves” has nothing to do with it. Rather, it’s about booting those who can beat you in the end. Did Jonas “deserve” to be there? Definitely. But getting rid of him was definitely the smart decision, at least strategically. Ironically, the very reasons he “deserved” to be there were the same reasons it was smart to boot him: Jonas was likable and unassuming, and hadn’t ruffled too many feathers. In other words, he could’ve been answering questions at the end. There is, however, one reason they should’ve kept Jonas around a little longer: Food. I wonder if anyone left has his culinary skills. It brings back memories of the show’s first season when Gervais noted that if Richard got voted off they wouldn’t be eating. Granted, Richard fished for food rather than actually cooking it, but the point remains. Should they have targeted Tarzan instead, as Chelsea hinted? Frankly, I think that may have been the worst decision they could have made. Tarzan really isn’t a threat physically, and as confused as he seems to get, he probably isn’t one strategically either. In fact, Tarzan may be the perfect person to go up against at the end. Again, “deserved” is frankly beside the point. At this point, let me ask this question: Were you glad Colton was gone for whatever reason? Granted, there wasn’t nearly as much drama this week, but I’m glad we no longer have to listen to him. Unabashed conceit is one thing, but his unnecessary personal attacks and bullying of the others were downright painful to watch and went beyond the spirit of the game. But there’s another issue regarding Colton that should be addressed. Last week, I expressed skepticism of his claim that he was actually planning to oust Alicia and even discussed it with Jonas, and was wondering what Jonas would have to say about that. Well, in his RNO interview, Jonas actually confirmed that Colton discussed this with him. However, I find it awfully interesting that Jonas himself isn’t really convinced this was Colton’s plan. Keep in mind that in an Insider clip, Colton almost broke his own arm patting himself on the back for being such a good liar. So was he telling Jonas the truth? Only God and Colton know for sure, but I’m glad I’m not alone in being a little suspicious of Colton. Jonas also points out that Colton played the game emotionally, citing the ouster of Bill. Jonas also explained why he didn’t try to stop Colton: If he had, Colton may well have turned on him and he might not have made it this far. In that respect, Jonas may have made the smart decision at the time – though it does beg the question of why everyone else couldn’t just band together and tell Colton, “No.” Well, the jury has its first member, and it will be interesting to see how the rest of the season plays out. You can follow Reality News Online on Twitter and on Facebook! On Twitter, you can get up to the minute notifications on article postings and other reality TV news by following us. 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Ken was last seen trying to take out a retro-active life insurance policy out on Mike. He can be reached at YourNextOfKen@aol.com. Be sure to sign up for our e-mail update so you can stay informed about new articles on the site! Don’t forget to take a look at the rest of the site and buy reality show stuff at our Reality TV Store, and don't miss The Reality TV Hall of Shame! For more news about Survivor, be sure to check out SirLinksALot: Survivor and Survivor Fever! |