Survivor: The Amazon – Use Sex, Not Stupidity, As a Weapon

What is up with half these people on this show? They aren't the brightest bunch, are they? The series started off well enough but it's taken a turn heading towards the ground and fast.

Heidi said she is like a "rock in a hard stone." WHAT? How hard is it to remember that the saying is, "between a rock and a hard place"? It is not a rock in a hard stone. That doesn't even make sense to a three-year-old. And, apparently, Gene Simmons or Gene Autry is now playing Survivor and is a member of Tambaqui. Hmm, who knew? I guess only Heidi did because she voted for him. There should be a rule that her vote doesn't count due to sheer stupidity!

I actually thought she would completely get on my nerves this episode, but she didn't. I felt almost sorry for her because she is so incredibly stupid. She's like the idiot you drag along with you only to ditch them later when someone better comes along. At least we didn't have to hear how cute she is again! She's actually looking worse every episode. And what is up with the way she wears her buff? It looks so bad! Thin it out or something, it looks awful! I also think she needs to dye her hair. I'm fairly sure the color she has is natural but it is so bad! I don't normally pick on the way people look but she opened the door a long time ago by telling us repeatedly how cute she is and I'm gonna just walk right in!

I also noticed that she has shifty eyes and looks stunned by most of what goes on around her. When Jeanne (not Gene) was voted out, you'd think it was something that had never crossed her mind before because she looked so stunned! I don't get it. It must be because she is that rock in a hard stone. That might account for her confused look at Tribal Council.

Shawna actually got on my nerves the most this episode. Before the men showed up, or as they were arriving, she gets off the shelter and sort of says, "Blah..." like here we go again, yuck. Then she sees them and she's all of a sudden 16 again seeing her prom date show up. I don't think she has any idea that she is in the Amazon playing Survivor! Half of this show is like a gigantic, drunken, fraternity party. It's a little ridiculous. If Mark Burnett wanted to produce a porn movie, he definitely picked the right actors for it!

Deena, Christy, Matt, Roger, and Butch are about the only ones on this show that are likable anymore. Dave and Jenna are tolerable. I know, I said Jenna was tolerable. She actually doesn't bother me and was even likable this last episode. If she hadn't had such a rough start, I would probably put her on my likable list – but not yet. It wasn't very bright of her to give out her entire tribe's secrets but I'm not sure that Dave didn't give out too much information either. You would think, being a rocket scientist, he would know not to give away secrets, but like I said, this isn't the brightest bunch.

Alex and Rob are just children. Rob and his “waa, waa, waa, Dave's mean” was ridiculous. Get over it! You're playing Survivor not singing karaoke to your buddies in your Mommy's basement while she makes you all brownies! I'm not really sure why I think Alex is a child. He's starting to rub me the wrong way. I think it's his part in Survivor: The Porn Show that's bothering me. I mean hey, forget those dating services, all you need to do is go on a reality show. And, we all know how well reality show romances work out, don't we?

I also think they chose the youngest to meet hoping that they would talk and spill more about their tribes – and of course have sex. Jeff can talk about adults owning the village and the young having opportunity 'til the sloths come home but the fact is, they want some controversy and sex on the this show.

Anyway, now that my little rant is over, let's get to the different way men and women play this game, shall we?

Assuming that Dave did not tell Jenna as much about his tribe as she told him, this fits with the way men differ from women. Dave concentrated on ages and occupations while Jenna talked about personalities. Was it strategy? Maybe. But, more than likely Dave didn't think of it. I don't think who gets him a Coke and who sleeps next to him are large issues in his mind. Alex summed up exactly what I was thinking when he said, "We walk around like this is our backyard." The men are very comfortable there. Why? Because they're men!

That may piss off all sorts of outdoorsy women but the fact is, no matter how adventurous you are, you still care how your hair looks. We constantly see these women (on every Survivor series I've seen) braiding each other's hair. My friend Tammy is very outdoorsy and it takes this woman like two minutes to get ready for going anywhere. She doesn't wear make-up or do her nails but she cares about her hair. She's still a woman even though she doesn't come across as a little princess. And, no matter how much you try to get away from the way your gender plays a role in your personality, you won't.

I had an e-mail saying that this game is basically set up for a man to win. I agree with that. I also think the right woman can win. Especially in a game like this one. Is there one of them smart enough out there to win it? I don't know. Maybe Jenna. As much as people don't like her, she isn't completely stupid and she is sorta pretty. She can use that to her advantage if she keeps the younger guys around. The younger men are going to be thinking now about fish, fire, water, and women – and the order can shift if Jenna plays her cards right. I honestly don't think Heidi is smart enough (as if my statements above didn’t hint at that already), Christy doesn't know how to use it to her advantage, Shawna is just a twit, and Deena won't use it.

I almost just said that this shouldn't be a game that's come down to who can manipulate who more but you know what? That's exactly what it should be and always has been. Jenna can do it. The rules have changed a bit and she's going to need to use the fact that she's a woman to her advantage. Unfortunately, I think she's the only one that can. The game has been set up in a way that gender is going to play a large role.

Let's face it, if you know how to use it, men are fairly easy to manipulate. Not all men, but young men. Roger and Butch aren't going to buy into it at all. They know by this point what it's all about. But the other ones? They'll be lost as soon as one of the women gets their claws into them. If Jenna plays this game the right way, she can win. She needs to get rid of Shawna and Deena and drag stupid Heidi along with her. She'd be smart to get rid of Butch and Roger too. Then the boys can fight amongst themselves and she can sail right into the final two.

At least, that's what I would do.

Paris Cosby co-owns, edits, and writes parenting articles for momsaidso.com. She can be reached at paris@momsaidso.com

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