The Apprentice 4, Episode 5: The Rubble Man

Betsy is out this week, so I’ll be playing Bill to her George again. How fitting, since Bill is one of our special guests in this episode! In other news, I still have two boyfriends on the show, Brian and James. I hope they’re okay with me two-timing them.

Previously on The Apprentice: Kristi told Toral off, though Rebecca continued to defend her. The teams were asked to create a new mascot for Dairy Queen. The men created Ginnie the Genie and the women created Zip, though no one is sure what it is. The Zip costume became a point of conflict for the women, especially Felisha and Toral, when Toral refused to wear it. Capital Edge lost and even Rebecca gave up on Toral. Trump fired Toral without even bringing the women back for a second boardroom. Fourteen candidates are left – who will be fired next?

The men lounge around the suite, waiting for the women to return. Mark says that it’s blonde vs. brunette over at Capital Edge. He thinks that Felisha will be fired. He notes that the women have bad team dynamics and they act like sorority girls who have been sleeping with each other’s boyfriends.

The women return and the guys are shocked that the Boardroom is already over. The girls announce that they’re having a meeting in a bedroom and one of my boyfriends, James, says he’ll meet them in there. Something tells me he’d be okay with me two-timing him. He’s probably two-timing me already. Rebecca interviews that the women have agreed that what happens in the Boardroom stays in the Boardroom. (We learned a couple of weeks ago that the men have the same agreement.) Kristi says that they need to let go of what’s happened and not hold back in the future. Marshawn suggests that they cut out all the back-talking. When they lose, the bickering makes them more divisive. The other women agree.

In the morning, Alla answers the Trump Phone and Alla answers and is told the candidates should meet Trump at Grand Army Plaza at 7:30. Apparently Trump is very busy, so they can’t be late. The candidates gather at Grand Army Plaza and Trump, Carolyn, and Bill pull up in a limo. Trump notes that the women of Capital Edge are dropping like flies. He gives them one minute to decide if they want to bring a man from Excel over to their team. The women immediately say that they don’t need a minute – they want Randal. Excellent choice. Felisha explains that they chose Randal for two reasons – he’ll be an asset to their team and his absence will hurt the men.

Trump tells the candidates that parades are a big part of where they’re standing, on Fifth Avenue. This week, they’ll work with Sony Pictures to help promote a new movie, Zathura. Each team will build a prototype float and will be judged on their abilities to promote and advertise the film. They’ll meet with a Sony executive, Jeff Amer, and the film’s director, Jon Favreau. Yay! The winners will be rewarded and the losers, of course, will head to the Boardroom. Trump reminds us that Clay is exempt from being fired this week. Betsy’s boyfriend Josh interviews that he’s upset about the women taking Randal. He has the “secret sauce” (I don’t want to know) and the women now have a huge advantage.

This week’s Trump Lesson of the Week is, “Money Matters.” Trump tells us that money is a scorecard – the amount of it lets you know which businesses are doing well. We see him talking with someone on the phone in his office. I’ve completely stopped paying attention to these scenes. Trump says it’s all about the money. The Jenn Lesson of the Week is: Don’t keep chicken in your refrigerator past its expiration date. You’ll be very, very sorry. We learned that the hard way this week.

Excel’s project manager is my other boyfriend, Brian. The team meets with Jeff and Jon, who tell them about the movie. Jon says that it’s both a sci-fi and family movie, but it’s not just for kids. Brian starts to ask a question, but he mispronounces the name of the movie, calling it Zarutha. Jon jokes that they’re done there and he’s leaving. He tells the men that one of the intentions of this task is to teach people the name of the movie. He tells them that they’re going to watch the trailer and says that the movie is about the relationship between the two main characters, who are brothers.

The guys watch the trailer and Josh gives a good, succinct summary of the movie – it’s about two brothers who start playing a board game. Their house is uprooted and becomes like a spaceship, which takes them on a wild adventure. After the trailer, the guys start clapping and Jon jokes that that won’t win them any points.

Capital Edge’s project manager is Jennifer. She says that she’s here to kick major butt and she can manage the women on her team. She tells them that the game is a major part of the movie and should be a major part of the float. Jon tells the women that he had trouble pronouncing the name of the movie when he first heard about it; he almost didn’t get the job directing it because he couldn’t pronounce the title. He wants them to incorporate the name in the float.

Over at Excel, Brian reiterates the point that they need to focus on the name. The guys build the float, looking like they’re working pretty hard. Brian says that it looks like the game has come to life. They want people to feel the experience that the brothers have in the movie. Markus, by the way, is standing around, doing nothing. Brian asks him if he wants to paint. Markus doesn’t seem interested. Does this seem familiar to anyone else? Brian says that Markus is a pain and, as project manager, he hopes to keep a tighter leash on him. However, he has to manage a lot of things at once.

The men are ready for dinner, so Brian decides that Markus can be useful by getting the guys food. Unfortunately, he chooses to order Markus to do this. Now, be nice, Brian. Markus claims again that he’s being marginalized. He says that he’s a “Teflon player” and the guys can never set him up.

The women build their float. Kristi, who apparently came up with the concept (or so we’re led to believe, at least), explains that we see the house, which gets ripped away to reveal the galaxy. She and Jennifer start discussing the transition and don’t agree on how it should look. Marshawn says that Kristi is confrontational, bossy, and even disobedient. She thinks that Jen has some weak areas but Kristi isn’t going to improve. Jen asks Kristi to listen before she starts doing anything. Randal thinks the women need to respect each other, like the men do, or they’ll keep losing.

Jennifer pulls Kristi aside and tells her that she’s being bossy. Kristi asks if she really means bold. She doesn’t. Jen says that she’s bothering people. She does a lot of work, but it’s not okay for her to whine. She doesn’t think Kristi realizes how much she complains. Jen says in an interview that Kristi’s negative attitude brings the team down and she needs to go. Wow. Is this the end of the blondes’ alliance? Kristi thinks that Jen is blowing things out of proportion.

The men of Excel are tired. Markus is still not doing anything. Josh says it’s frustrating because he’s working so hard that he’s sweating, but Markus keeps procrastinating. He says that Markus needs to do something.

Markus pulls Brian aside and Markus says that Brian saying he was only good for getting food offended him. Brian says that he was joking, but Markus isn’t amused. He notes that if they lose, he’ll be brought to the Boardroom. Well, maybe if you did some work, you wouldn’t lose.

Markus says that he’s trying his best, but he’s not happy about the game Brian is playing. Brian is surprised that Markus thinks he’s playing a game. He adds that Markus has some guts to bring this up right before their presentation. Josh joins the discussion and tells Markus that he needs to come help the other guys clean up. Markus tries to stall and Josh tells him that he won’t accept any more excuses. Markus’ time is up. He says that if he’s out there sweeping, Markus needs to be sweeping right next to him. Josh is tired of carrying Markus and wonders if he thinks he’s a prima donna.

Rebecca, Randal, Marshawn, and Jennifer head to a carpet store to get some things for their presentation. Marshawn thinks this is a bad idea, since they should be finalizing their float and practicing their presentation. Back at the float, Alla and Felisha are trying to plug something in. Jen calls and Felisha hangs up on her so they can keep working. Alla is unhappy that the project manager and half of the team are out shopping. Felisha says that the planning has been bad.

Bill stops by and Kristi tells him that Jen is out shopping. Alla explains that they’re trying to make the presentation into a red carpet affair, so Jen wants to get actual red carpet. Kristi notes that they have about ten minutes left to finish up. Alla says that it’s crucial that they finish the float. If there’s no name on it and the place is a mess, they could be disqualified. She says that she, Felisha, and Kristi saved the day.

Presentation time! Carolyn and Bill head to Excel, followed by Jeff and Jon. Brian explains the float, stating that it shows a few of the brothers’ experiences in the movie. He also mentions that they used branding (someone was paying attention last week) by featuring the name of the film. They’ve also included some audio on the float, so people know how Zathura is pronounced.

Brian starts talking about how he saw ET when he was 12, which was a year ago (he only gets polite laughter for this). Carolyn looks unimpressed. Jon compliments the float and, for some reason, Brian is still talking. Jon actually tells him to be quiet because he’s giving him a compliment. Josh says that it was like Brian was “injected with Markus fluid.” Um, okay. Brian tells Jon and Jeff that his team did terrific work. Carolyn notes that the team incorporated the name and included the website on the back of the float. She thinks the float was true to the movie’s spirit.

Bill, Carolyn, Jon, and Jeff next head over to Capital Edge. Jennifer introduces the presentation, but she keeps pronouncing the name of the movie as “Zenthura.” Randal mentions this in an interview, noting that Carolyn and Bill kept laughing. Under the float, Kristi cringes. Jen explains that they wanted to make the house bigger but didn’t. Instead, she “amputated” a mannequin’s legs to make the house look bigger. Alla says that the presentation was a disaster. Jen couldn’t get her thoughts together. Jen, however, feels great. She spoke from her heart and thinks that Jeff and Jon loved the float, too.

Trump heads to Sony as Jon and Jeff discuss the floats and presentations. Jon says that this is about making a good first impression, and he knew which float he liked better as soon as he saw it. Everyone gathers and Jeff says that both teams were incredible. Excel did especially well with the goal of incorporating the title. Jon likes that the house looked like it was floating; he thinks it looked small and vulnerable. As for Capital Edge, they only had the title in two places on the float – one of which was the back. Jon says that they had some issues with the scale. Jeff notes that Jen kept mispronouncing the title of the movie. He tried to give the team the benefit of the doubt, since they were tired, but the men were tired, too. Since this was mainly a marketing task, Excel wins for the third week in a row.

Trump asks if Brian’s leadership warrants an exemption. The men vote unanimously to give him one. Yay for my boyfriend! Trump adds that in six weeks, the men’s float will appear in the Hollywood Holiday Parade. Since they did so well in this collaboration, Excel’s reward is to head to a recording studio and collaborate with singer/songwriter/rapper/former Fugee Wyclef Jean. Trump tells Brian that he’s a “little impressed.” Hey, is that a short joke? Look, our children will be short, but they’ll also be cute, so back off. The women will once again be back in the Boardroom.

In the suite, Kristi complains that she’s sick of losing. She doesn’t think that she has a negative attitude. Randal tells her that being on the women’s team was eye-opening. He notes that there were times when someone was talking and no one was listening. Kristi admits that she doesn’t always listen. Randal says that something is “broken” on the team and needs to be fixed. He adds that there’s a saying that people need to understand, then be understood. Well, not so much a saying as part of the Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi, but still a good point. Unless he makes a huge, unforgivable mistake, I think Randal will make it to the final four, if not the final two. Mark my words.

Now for my favorite sequence in the episode, and possibly in all four seasons of this show. The men head to Platinum Sound for their reward and meet Wyclef Jean. They discuss the track they want to record and Josh says something about the Rubble Man. He explains that his nickname for Brian is Rubble, after Barney Rubble, because he has no indent in the back of his head. Someone off-camera (Clay, I think) calls Brian the Rubble Rhyme Master and Brian says he’ll “rhyme it up.” Wyclef says they’ll call the track “The Rubble Man.”

Mark starts playing the drums. He interviews that they’ve been up for 36 hours and it’s hard to be excited about anything, but Wyclef is a “musical genius” and has them doing different lines and playing different instruments. Wyclef helps Brian play bongos, then gives Markus help with yelling, “You know who this is!” Adam sings a few lines of the song that I will now be playing on repeat for the next week: “Ladies, if you see us in the club, freakin’ / Join us, it’s the Rubble dance” (cue “ahhh”s from other guys).

In a montage, we hear more “ahhhh”ing. Brian raps, “I’m a medium pimp, got girls around the world / In the club, watchin’ girls twirl.” The guys suggest some more words. More rapping from Brian: “Music pump pumpin’ it, sound system thumpin’ it.” Wyclef is impressed. Mark plays drums again. Markus yells, “You know who this is!” again as Wyclef lip-synchs it. Brian (I think) spins on the floor. “Yeah,” Josh says in a low voice. Adam sings as Mark lip-synchs, “Ladies, [insert a woman moaning] if you see us in the club, dancin’ / Join us, it’s the Rubble Man.” Brian’s dancing. Markus: “You know who this is!” Josh lip-synchs to his own “yeah.”

Brian does his rap again. “Ain’t hard to find, if you got the mental power / You can find me in the street, at the Trump World Tower.” He and Clay both lip-synch to this. “Pop her attitude, you don’t have to be rude / Skinny supermodel, you put me in the mood. / Music pump pumpin’ it, sound system thumpin’ / Trump Trump Trumpin’ it.” Brian does a flip by the mixing board. Josh: “Yeah.” Adam: “Ladies [woman’s moan], if you see us in the club, freakin’ / join in, it’s the Rubble Man.” Markus: “You know who this is!” Josh: “Yeah.” Everyone’s tired and dancing anyway. It’s so awesome.

Josh explains that the task involved creativity and “building a layered flow,” which is parallel to what they did while piecing together the song. At the end of the song, someone plays the bass. My only question is, who was doing that woman’s moan?

Back at the suite, Jen tells James that Kristi is a pain and was rotten to her. She thinks that Kristi is trying to unnerve her. James says that the task was about the float, not the presentation. Jen says that Kristi couldn’t be managed (no, no, never say that). She’s bossy and needs to go. I thought those girls were BFF. James tells Jen that she needs to outsmart Kristi.

Boardroom time! Trump asks Kristi why the women lost. She says that they didn’t bring in the corporate branding. No, Kristi, that was last week’s reason. Jen immediately jumps in and says that Trump shouldn’t ask Kristi. She’s a liability and has a negative attitude. Alla speaks up that during the construction of the float, Jen had some good control over the group, but it was short-lived. Carolyn asks if the bad presentation contributed to the loss. Jen says that she was overwhelmed. Carolyn notes that they missed on all of the criteria they were given, especially the title and the scale of the float.

Jen tries to turn it around on Kristi again. Trump notes that Kristi is tough, but that doesn’t necessarily mean she’s bad. Jen disagrees – she’s the bad kind of tough. Kristi is so giving her back her best friend necklace and deleting Jen’s name from her Instant Messenger. Marshawn agrees that Kristi is bossy. Jen starts to say something and Trump tells her to be quiet, since Marshawn is on her side. Marshawn continues that Kristi causes problems.

Trump asks Randal’s opinion. Randal wonders if he wants him to focus on the time issue or team dynamic. Trump says he should focus on the team and Randal says that, in that case, Kristi should be fired. Marshawn thinks that Kristi should go for the same reason Melissa went. Kristi is shocked, since she’s only received positive feedback. Jen claims that she’s talking to Kristi about her attitude, but Kristi doesn’t seem to remember this. Jen tells Trump that she has potential to be the apprentice, but Kristi doesn’t. Kristi accuses Jen of being intimidated (I guess Marshawn was on the money with her Melissa comparison) and Jen says that Kristi is intimidated by her. Trump asks for Jen’s choices to bring back to the Boardroom. Jen chooses Kristi and… no one else. That’s certainly a popular decision this season.

After everyone leaves, Carolyn tells Trump that Kristi is headstrong, but she’s not the reason the team lost. Jen made too many mistakes. Bill agrees, noting that Jen wasn’t there when the others were finishing putting the float together. Kristi and Jen return and Trump asks if they like each other. Neither responds. He asks Kristi if she doesn’t like Jen. Kristi says she doesn’t and she wouldn’t hire Jen. Jen isn’t a straight-shooter, she’s bad with time management, and she’s a bad leader.

Jen says that Kristi is difficult to manage. Bill asks her why she didn’t bench Kristi. Jen says that time was of the essence and Kristi was getting things done. Carolyn asks how Jen plans to lead an entire company if she can’t manage one person. The women start talking about their accomplishments. Jen says that the team doesn’t like Kristi. Kristi thinks she’s just outspoken, but she gets results. Jen says that people like to follow her. Carolyn wonders if this is because she’s a good leader or just because she’s nice. Jen thinks it’s both. Carolyn replies that this is a job interview, not a popularity contest.

Trump says that Jen and Kristi are complete opposites, which is something he isn’t used to seeing. Kristi has an edge, but she causes problems. She’s too hard to work with and causes distractions. Jen is a good leader, but not necessarily under pressure. Trump says that he wants to give Jen another chance, so Kristi is fired.

Out in the lobby, Jennifer whispers, “Sorry,” to Kristi. Kristi tells her to shut up. And she can forget about them sharing a limo to prom! Trump asks Bill what he thinks. Bill says that Jen got through by the skin of her teeth. Trump says that the women don’t get along and Kristi was no help. He wants to make drastic changes to the women’s team because as it is, it’s not working.

For a couple of seasons, I’ve been trading e-mails with a reader and discussing various candidates. A couple of days ago, we were talking about Jen, Kristi, and Alla’s alliance and how it would inevitably fall apart. We agreed that when that happened, Alla would be fine, Jen would falter but recover, and Kristi would be the one most affected. It looks like we were right. I think that Kristi and Jen were equally responsible for the loss, but Kristi was the right choice to be fired. This team has enough problems without having to deal with someone who is distracting and bossy. Of course, Kristi leaving probably won’t remedy anything, but at this point, I think it was for the best. Jen does seem like a good leader – better than Kristi, at least – and I think she’s more of an asset to her team than Kristi was.

As Kristi heads to the cab and Jen heads to the suite, we hear part of the men’s song again. Hee! This should be the new theme song for the show. It cracks me up. In the cab, Kristi says that when she and Jen walked out, Jen gave her a pitiful look and tried to shake her hand. She says that Jen was trying to be sweet but is a big fake and Kristi doesn’t care for her. She wishes Alla and Felisha luck, hoping one of them wins.

Next week: Carolyn’s in charge! She gets to sit in Trump’s chair. One of the teams fails so horribly that Trump returns. And Daddy’s ticked. There’s some sort of Boardroom first. I’m kind of hoping Trump swears.

Jenn Brasler is the Assistant Editor of Reality News Online and an aspiring writer from Falls Church, VA. You can e-mail her at luckyjenn@hotmail.com. Since Josh and Brian get along so well, maybe she and Betsy can double date.

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