Survivor: Cook Islands, Episode 6’s Missing Intelligence Award – God Created the Flirt As Soon As He Made the Fool

A big ol’ raspberry to those responsible for the “double boot” scenario again. That challenge was brutal, and Aitu deserved the chance to celebrate their win fully without some damnable Tribal Council hanging over their heads. If you want to boot two off, make it two off the losing tribe. And tell you what, make it a real twist. Don’t tell them! The top two vote-getters are gone, and you don’t say that until you’ve got them captive at Tribal. Throw another twist in it and allow the winning tribe (or a representative thereof) to give immunity to one person, preferably before the double boot twist is revealed.

I should work for these people. Oh, speaking of! Does anyone else think that Julie might be one of the “testers” that they show significant, but never identifying, body parts of when showing us how the challenges work? I can’t think of a better way to stay with the loverboy, yet still feel productive while having fun!

I also believe they should do a weird all-star version of Survivor. I may have said this before, so bear with me. Take two groups of 16, and do not let them even have a HINT of each other’s existence. Run each group like it’s a real version of Survivor, with whatever twists you want to have, until you get down to ten on each side. Here, at this almost midway point of the game, people are starting to break down more, they’re hungry, they’re mentally fatigued, etc. Then merge them into one tribe of ten on each “game” so they feel like, “Woo hoo, I made it to the merge,” and then suddenly, slap them with it! Two tribes of ten meet in the beach.

This season could be a tad longer than other seasons. You could also run back-to-back immunity challenges for a while to help whittle away numbers quicker. Oh, and if you really want it to be odd, one team is comprised of new players, but one team is an all-star team.

I want pay if this ever happens!

All right, enough speculating and so on. On to the episode! First off, everyone’s right to start thinking about Jonathan as someone to be wary of. He appears wily, so they may want to oust him soon. Plus, there are still five left from the white tribe, and some of them seem tight. Might want to start picking them off now!

Jenny stirred up some controversy on the Jenna/Dalton show this week. I hadn’t noticed the gun on her card for Cristina. I’m wondering, though, if people aren’t reading a bit much into it? Perhaps she just scribbles things that to her symbolize the person she’s voting out. A gun would make sense for Cristina because she a) made an issue over being shot, and b) is a cop. I haven’t noticed anything malicious about Jenny yet. Actually, I haven’t noticed much of anything about Jenny yet. We’ll see.

Cristina? I am sure you’re a lovely person. However, the “cop thing” you complain about being a shadow over you? That’s your own fault. You make it such a part of who you are that others can’t forget it either. If you make a big deal out of something, don’t be surprised if you are either treated accordingly or judged accordingly, etc. You could have played this game differently, so don’t blame being a cop on why you couldn’t have or didn’t or whatever. Oh, and the whining over being “choked” by Jessica? Good gods. She hadn’t even seemed to barely touch you when you were whining loudly enough to draw Jeff’s attention. And then you did the same thing! Pot meet kettle, and if you dish it out, learn to take it.

While I’m at it, another thing, Cristina. It’s not disrespectful for someone to joke about being able to wrestle a cop or take down a cop. To me, that’s a JOKE. You know what one is, right? Like I said above, you made being a cop an issue. So don’t be surprised when people run with it. Some people hide being a lawyer, as we’ve seen in previous seasons, because they don’t want to be associated with the negative stereotypes surrounding lawyers, so it’s not just you. You want to bet some good lawyer jokes might have been flying if people weren’t busy trying to shut Cao Boi up from telling good Asian jokes?!

Plan Voodoo: very interesting concept, Cao Boi. Of course, it all depends on how tiebreakers work, which seems to be a fluid process that I’ve never quite grasped. I wish they’d lay it out clearly at the beginning of every new season what the new rules are for that.

It was probably smart of Yul not to go along with it, since it would be one step closer to revealing who had the immunity idol. Not a good thing for Yul.

I can’t remember where I read it, but speaking of the immunity idol, I do agree it would be highly amusing for Cao Boi and for Joanna of Amazon to be on the same team. Two spiritual people, and I bet Cao Boi could respect her spirituality, but I bet she couldn’t respect his! Not when she couldn’t handle an idol around the camp!

Ah, but enough about this. We have an award to give! Might I have a drum roll please? How about a random BOING noise of stupidity? Groovy, thanks.

The winner of this week’s MIA is Candice! Yes, scrappy Candice who impressed the hell out of me during the challenge wins this for making sheep’s eyes at Adam all throughout the freakin’ Tribal Council. Woman! Do you not realize that is an absolute clue that the two of you will probably pal up at a merge, and ergo, one of you should not be around at the merge?! Your tribe already suspects Parvati and Adam of sending you to Exile Island to save you. His tribe already suspects that your original tribe will all pull back together, and you’re still five strong. Not since someone’s “remember the merge” sort of comment a few seasons back that led automatically to someone’s ouster have I seen so blatant a display of companionship between opposite teams. [I am discounting Billy’s alleged love connection earlier this season on the grounds of delusional insanity]

So Candice, for inexcusable lapses in judgment during Tribal Council, this Missing Intelligence Award is for you! Keep heart in the fact that you can wrap your legs and arms around a pole like nobody’s business! Ah, the comments I could make!

If you haven’t already, be sure to check out these other recent Survivor: Cook Islands articles here on RealityNewsOnline:

Heathyr Fields Ford resides in the central part of Washington State, but is a Seattleite at heart. Anyone wanting her wit and creativity on that side of the mountains is welcome to send her job offers to heathyranne@hotmail.com or heck, she’ll even accept feedback and nominations for MIAs!

Be sure to sign up for our e-mail update so you can stay informed about new articles on the site! And take a look at the rest of the site. You can find all of our recaps and other info on this show at the Survivor: Cook Islands page, and take a look at our The Amazing Race 8 page and our Apprentice: Martha Stewart page. You can even buy reality show stuff at our Reality TV Store!

For more news about Survivor, be sure to check out SirLinksALot: Survivor: Cook Islands and Survivor Fever!