Dancing with the Stars 5, October 23: J. Lo and Scoring Low

Tom and Samantha welcome us to the show. They review the previous night’s action. Of course, I’ve already done that for you in the form of a recap.

Next, they go over the current standings:

Len explains that he, Bruno, and Carrie Ann selected Mel & Maksim to perform tonight’s encore dance. Thank you, judges; not only is this a great dance, but it also gives us another chance to see Maksim’s butt wiggle.

Guess what? Jennifer Lopez performs “Do it Well.” The performance is enjoyable, but I’m a bit distracted by her outfit. It includes a poncho-like apparatus, which reminds me of the creature from “Jeepers Creepers.” Spooky.

The audience members comment on last night’s show. People talk about Marie’s collapse, Sabrina & Mark’s chemistry, and Mark Cuban’s luck.

Tom and Samantha reveal the first two couples that are safe. They include Sabrina & Mark and Mel & Maksim. Hooray!

Samantha talks to some of the couples backstage. Marie says that she is feeling fine. Jonathan talks about how difficult next week’s group dance will be.

Various dancers perform to “Dance, Dance.” The best way to describe the routine is “controlled chaos.”

J. Lo returns and sings “Let’s Get Loud” while some of the professionals dance. You know what I think would be entertaining? Have the stars dance instead of the professionals. Uh, huh! Isn’t that a good idea?

Um, it’s 9:38 PM; shouldn’t we find out which couples are safe and which aren’t? Apparently the producers don’t think there’s a need to rush; they show us a segment on what the professionals think of choreographing routines. Words such as “exhausting, difficult, and tricky” are used.

Tom and Samantha finally reveal the next safe couple. It is Edyta & Cameron.

Next, Tom tells us that Samantha is talking to two couples who do not know their fate yet; however, the one couple that she has cornered is Mel & Maksim. She babbles on about being in the bottom and how frightening it is. What frightens me are her interviewing skills.

The producers now remind us of how busy the stars are. Jennie runs through a list of everyone’s responsibilities. I find it difficult to sympathize with Mark though; I’d be willing to run his empire and dance at the same time.

Tom and Samantha make known the next couple that is continuing on in the competition. It is Jennie & Derek. Samantha then quickly tells us that Kym & Mark are in the bottom two. That was awkward.

Next, they reveal that Marie & Jonathan and Julianne & Helio are safe. That means that Jane & Tony are in the bottom two.

Tom gets down to business and says that the couple leaving the competition is Kym & Mark.

Mark tells us that he lost 30 pounds since starting the show, but gained new friends. Kym tells Mark that she is going to miss him. Sniff.

With that, Kym & Mark dance their last dance. Even though they won’t be back next week, I will be! Join me then for more dancing and merriment

Jill is an east coast mama who loves Michael Kors, Bea Arthur, and reality television. She can be reached at jillcjones@zoominternet.net to discuss these and other topics.

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