America’s Next Top Model, Episode 3: Makeover Madness!

There’s nothing like experiencing snow in the Dallas-Fort Worth area. Actually, a snowflake was reported on the Oklahoma border at noon today and it sent a wave of people fleeing work early; rushing to their cars, only to sit parked on the freeways for two hours. I just know all you folks up north just laugh when you see these crazy Texans driving. Believe me, it’s ugly. But the good thing out of all of this is that I got home a little earlier than usual to finish up this week’s ANTM recap.

So, speaking of flakes…

Last week on America’s Next Top Model, the final fourteen stormed their new house, modeled on the runway in Times Square, and did their first photo shoot depicting the lives of the homeless. The judging panel added model Paulina Porizkova. And despite a beautiful picture, blonde Kim realized that modeling wasn’t her game and left the show, while Tyra cut another model, Atalya.

Wow, how can you top that? Oh yeah, with a makeover episode! Yippee!!

Dominique, the drag queen-like model, opens up the show telling us that she’s high fashion and a diva. She’s fierce and competitive! And she was in the bottom four last week. She’s ready to move up.

The doorbell rings and the squealing begins! The girls get bags of clothes and shoes. Yes, loads of free stuff. The reactions are mostly of excitement, but poor tomboy Lauren can’t figure out what to do with her new 4-inch or worse heels when she’s used to Converse shoes. Oh boy, is she in for a quick awakening! Allison then sullenly tells us that she has waaaaay more experience than the other girls and has been overseas modeling. That may be true, sweetie, but you need to attempt to be nice to these girls to make the next couple of months bearable. That said, I just love Allison. She is one who tells it like it is.

Fatima starts in early with comments to Allison about how Allison’s butt looks like it is an apple and it’s bigger than her own. This inflames Allison, who leaves the room and finds a tape measure to see where her body is. She’s a former anorexic, she tells us. “Comments like this are like tequila to an alcoholic,” she says. That’s powerful, as we see her wrapping the tape around her tiny waist.

Early the next morning, the girls’ limo pulls up to a local Walmart. We find out through heavy product placement, that they’re at Walmart for not only a casting, but also a Cover Girl makeup challenge. They have to shop for their own makeup, emphasizing three particular products, and then do their own faces in just a few minutes.

Claire and Whitney are singled out as doing well, with a few suggestions thrown to some of the other girls. In the end, Claire the breast-milk drinker, is declared the winner of the fast makeup challenge.

Back at the house, in the bunk bed room, Claire and Dominique tell us and the girls there that they are competing for their children’s sakes, not just for themselves. Dom is especially passionate to do well as she wants to be sure to be a good role model for her daughter. She wants to teach her to be a strong woman and to always believe in herself.

Later, Allison decides to poke a sharp stick at Fatima. Somehow, she and Whitney have gotten their hands on some fashion dolls. Allison decides to take the black doll and add tissue to the butt. She starts calling the doll “Fatima,” and has the doll say that the white “Allison” doll has a huge butt. It’s really sad that the girls have come to this. I think these two will stick around for a while as they’re attitudes and comments are making for some great TV confrontations.

Tyra mail comes with the aid of the scrolling screen. The girls annoyingly shout out the message, which seems soooo cryptic (insert eye-roll here). The message asks the girls if they “…want to just curl up and dye.” Hmmm…whatever could that mean?

Cut to the girls arriving at a posh salon. Ms J and Jay meet the girls and tell them that they don’t even know what will happen to the girls during the makeovers this cycle. Tyra then comes in and introduces Stephen Knoll, the salon’s owner. She tells the girls that they will have no idea what will happen to their hair when they sit down in the chairs. It will all be a surprise! Oh, you can just feel the tension and nerves. Could there be tears coming?

Anya screams as she sees herself in the mirror with a beautiful new blonde color shining back at her – and a new cut to boot. She looks great and almost icy.

Beautiful Whitney looks even more stunning as she gets extensions and a dark blonde color. I really do like her this season as well. I hope she is able to make it further than other plus-sized models have done. I didn’t notice until she had a side-by-side shot with her old and new looks, but with her hair darker, she looks a lot like Angie Harmon, another former model and Law and Order actress. Does anyone else see that?

Aimee gets her bangs cut, hair trimmed up and gets a smoking red color added to her hair. In the initial reveal, she looks old, but in her photo shoot she brings the sexiness on. This was a good makeover for her.

Marvita’s current mohawk can’t last long. She spies some extensions for a weave on a table nearby, wondering if they are for her. When I see the Tyra-vision, where Tyra keeps explaining what she picked for each model’s new look, I nearly wet my pants laughing as Tyra tells us that Marvita will be getting that weave she’s expecting, but it’s going to be right down the middle of her hea – and that they’re using horse hair. Yes, folks, she said horse hair. Oh boy, combined with her large teeth, I can’t imagine how this makeover will go over with Marvita. Surprisingly, when it’s done, she actually looks better than she ever has. Sigh…so much for that fun.

Tomboy Lauren also gets extensions which she thinks won’t look good, but she too looks amazing. She looks completely different too.

Ms J actually provides us with some dramatic, comic relief as he gets some hideous blond locks added to his short do. He totally spoofs all the drama from seasons past as he fakes some tears and pretends to stress. He even pulls out the silly inflections some of the girls have when they’re speaking. It’s actually quite funny! Isn’t it great when a show can make fun of itself?

Katarzyna really only gets a minor cut and a darker color. Claire goes platinum and loses the other side of her hair to even her out. Fatima’s hair is darkened and a weave is added. Allison goes reddish and bigger. Dominique’s hair goes much shorter and darker. Sweet Stacy-Ann wants to go long like Naomi Campbell, but she’s in for a shock as she’s shown her new, short, spikey-do.

Crazy Amis goes lighter and longer. She almost looks like that little blonde who was on Wings years back. I can’t remember her name off the top of my head. I’m sure it will come to me later. (Thanks to a Wiki search, I found her: Crystal Bernard.)

I didn’t realize it, but Fatima’s weave is still going on. She’s our one drama queen, in tears as they tighten the hair to her head. Holy cow, I had no idea of the pain people go through in getting these, but it looks like it’s awful! In the end, her longer, sleeker hair is just stunning, and she looks so much more sophisticated. Tyra managed to do a fantastic job picking new styles for these girls, bringing out the best qualities in each.

The next day, the girls are brought out near the water to shoot photos with New York City as the backdrop. And as an added bonus, Elle McPherson is there to give advice to the girls and bring along some lingerie she designed that they’ll be modeling in the shoot today. Now, it’s dang cold in NYC this time of year, and they’re making the girls model bras and panties outside. It’s going to be a trip to watch.

The first few girls, including Fatima, work the shoot well and look absolutely amazing. So far, this looks like a relatively tame episode. Then, all of a sudden, the music changes to sound almost clown-like as Whitney is literally cinched into a tight skirt and made to climb up onto the area of the boat they’re modeling from. Oh this can’t be good. But the music is for naught, as she pulls off a decent shoot; one that shows off her best curves.

Elle can sense that Lauren isn’t comfortable in her own skin and doesn’t feel sexy. She tries to help her out by complementing her new, long hair, which is followed up by complements by Jay. A male model, Ben, on Make Me a Supermodel, was also told only last week that he didn’t look like he felt sexy in photos and it resonated through to his pictures. Lauren should take Elle and Jay’s advice to heart if she is to last long this cycle. Sadly, she looks stiff and awkward in her shoot. It doesn’t look good.

Ah, Allison is getting overconfident as she tells us that she’s going to be way over and above the other girls. Her shoot is just ravaged by Jay as she is too posey and isn’t taking direction well from him or the photographer. This will come back to bite her in the near future. Has Allison been edited to have a large amount of air time this week? That’s usually not a good sign this early in the cycle.

Dominique is just a little less overconfident, and also winds up with a poor shoot. I suspect some of these girls will be torn up by the judges this week.

It’s time for the panel where Tyra, in a fierce, Christian-like jacket (refer to the Project Runway finale) tells us about all the fabulous prizes the winner of this cycle of ANTM will win. What the heck is in Ms J’s eyebrows? He…she has some multi-colored streaks happening that make him look like a drag clown! What a nut!

As the photos are rifled through, the standouts for me are Claire, Fatima, Dominique, and Aimee, though the judges have something to nitpick with each of them. Anya and Allison are the bottom two in my eyes, with overconfident Allison looking the most stiff in her shoot.

Well, they don’t like Dominique at all, and call her a soccer mom. Whoa, that’s not good. The girls are called in order, with awkward Lauren leading the pack. Next are Marvita, Aimee, Claire, Stacy Ann, Fatima, Anya, Whitney, Katarzyna, and Amis. Allison is shooting darts with her eyes as each girl is called. I’m thinking things are going to get ugly in the exit confessional if she’s the last one standing.

This leaves Dominique and Allison. If you remember from all the confessionals from these two this week, both are full of themselves. It’s unfortunate, as I really liked both of them before the show even started. Tyra tells Dom that she sees her as someone who talks in the third person all the time, and someone who thinks everything is perfect with her. She then tears into Allison for her attitude and her not knowing two little words, “Thank you.” Ouch. That isn’t good.

The final picture goes to Dominique as Allison is reduced to sobs and is clearly disappointed. None of the other girls seem especially upset as she hugs a few before leaving. Ms J rather smugly rips Allison’s name off his chest.

Amazingly enough, through the tears, Allison realizes that she screwed up, but will take the new photos, put them in her portfolio, and keep shopping around for agencies. You can see that she’s a fighter, and we’ll probably see her again in the future. Good for her. Maybe this little supper of humble pie will help her in the long run.

Next week, Ms J takes the girls to a firehouse for runway walk lessons where Amis and Fatima make him lose his cool. And Whitney somehow gets in the middle of a spat between Dominique and Fatima. Will we ever have enough of Fatima? Sheesh. See you all next week!

If you haven’t already, be sure to check out these other recent America’s Next Top Model articles:

Kari is a retired Air Force Hurricane Hunter who is down for big adventures. Please send any comments, questions, and thoughts about the bootees to Kari at flystorms2@yahoo.com.

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