The Apprentice 3, Episode 14 Extras: Bewitched, Bothered, and Bedazzled

Our preview scene this week takes us straight to Craig complaining about Kendra. How tired am I of their bickering? I feel like a mom whose two kids won’t stop fighting. I’m about to put them both in timeout. Kendra asks Craig to tell her what he thinks her problems are with time management, but he won’t. That’s helpful. Carolyn notes that their bad team dynamic might spell their doom.

Tana, Craig, and Kendra wait for someone to return from the boardroom. In an interview, Kendra calls Trump “Mr. T.,” which makes me giggle. Alex returns and says that he’s the only person whose been to the boardroom four times in a row - he has no equal. He starts talking about The Art of War. Kendra asks Alex if he thought he was going home; he says that he did.

After the task assignment, Alex talks about how he and Tana will have to tap into the hip culture. He thinks that he’ll be good at that, since he knows how their target audience thinks. Tana investigates clothing at Scoop so that they can figure out how much people spend there. They come up with the Rock Star Couture idea and meet with Burton. Tana says that this task is all about the customer. Alex says that “Rock Star Couture” is about American and being fashion forward and tough. Alex likes to talk about America, doesn’t he?

Kendra and Craig meet Romero. Kendra says that they took him to Scoop so that he could see the style and target audience there. At Hanes, Romero’s assistant employs the power of e-mail to help the team. As Kendra and Craig study Romero’s designs, Craig interviews that he’s an artist, so he thought that he should be the project manager, but Kendra said it was her turn. Ahh, I’m so glad my children are sharing. Of course, they can’t agree on a design, so the sharing thing kind of goes out the window.

It’s rhinestone time! Tana wants a Beadazzler. There are no Beadazzlers in Manhattan. For the record, I’d like to mention that Tana says she called every arts and crafts store in New York. Keep that in mind for later. Anyway, Staten Island has rhinestones, but no Beadazzlers. That’s good enough, so Tana and Alex make the trek to Staten Island.

Kendra wants to hire temps to pass out fliers. Craig doesn’t fight her on this and actually tells her that he’ll get six temps to work for them from 10-2. Could the sibling rivalry be ending? Kendra says that marketing is essential on this task. At least someone gets it, Tana and Alex. Craig makes calls, but only gets answering machines. (I think it’s nighttime, so obviously no one’s in the office.) When Kendra returns, Craig tells her that they’ll have to just hire people off of the street the next day. Kendra is frustrated and says that she shouldn’t have to micromanage Craig, especially when he claims to know more than her about life and business. Touché!

The next day, Kendra and Craig are at Scoop, discussing the shirts. Kendra talks about the shirt being a collector’s edition and wearable art. She wants the customers to feel like they’re getting something valuable that not a lot of people have. She tells George about their marketing strategy. Kendra interviews that she’s trying to tap into the psychology of the buyer. She and Craig have set up a poster with Romero’s photo and a little biography so that people can learn about him. She wants to appeal to the customers’ emotions.

Kendra and Craig get their reward. There’s flying. More flying. Dogfighting. Kendra wins. Craig says that he appreciates that Kendra has taken him through Hell and back. He’s ready to put aside his differences with her and everyone else. He thinks that he’s becoming a better person. That said… I hope that Kendra’s win in the dogfight is foreshadowing.

Alex and Tana head to the boardroom. Trump asks Alex why he chose Tana to join him. Alex says that Tana was the best member of Magna, then admits that he also wanted to leave the bicker twins together. Trump asks Tana what she thought of Burton. Tana thinks that he was great. Trump asks Alex the same question. Alex says that when he first saw Burton’s work, it wasn’t his kind of art, but he thinks that Burton did a great job. He claims that Kendra and Craig agreed that Net Worth’s T-shirt was better.

Trump wonders why Tana and Alex didn’t put anything on their shirt to mention that they were celebrating 50 years of T-shirt culture. He mentions the little logo that Kendra and Craig put on the back of their shirt. He asks about the T on Magna’s shirt; Tana says it stands for T-shirt but Trump jokes that it stands for Trump. Everyone laughs a little, like they’re thinking, “Ha ha, how wacky that Trump is.” Tana thinks that one of their problems was that no one liked Burton.

Trump asks about Rock Star Couture, wondering what it has to do with T-shirts. He says it doesn’t matter anyway, since the shirt was better, but didn’t sell. Alex says that the Rock Star Couture thing was supposed to appeal to the customers. He thinks that they should have focused more on their artist. Trump asks why they didn’t and Tana admits that it didn’t occur to them.

George wants to know what Net Worth did right. Tana thinks that they had a great design, then starts talking about the beads. Trump points out that the fact that they had a better design makes their bad marketing job look even worse. Alex agrees. Tana says that she put Alex in charge of marketing, but he doesn’t back this up. Trump sends them to the lobby.

After his discussion with George and Carolyn, Trump brings Alex and Tana back in. The group starts talking about the Staten Island trip, and Trump calls the fact that there were no beads in Manhattan “inconceivable.” I do not think that means what he thinks it means. George says that the only thing Net Worth accomplished was finding a Beadazzler after looking for one for six hours. Alex points out that they didn’t even do that. Trump is even more shocked, pointing out that there had to have been beads somewhere in Manhattan. He thinks that the Beadazzler is a ridiculous concept with a ridiculous name.

Tana says that she called about four stores for a Beadazzler. So there are only four arts and crafts stores in Manhattan, Tana? Okay… Trump says that he can take her to find beads in Manhattan right now. Ooh, field trip! Oh, wait, he’s not serious. Darn. Alex compares the bead fiasco to working on a building project and spending six weeks looking for door handles. Trump asks if he thinks that the traveling hurt the team. Alex says that marketing hurt them worse. He should’ve just said “yes.” Tana and Alex acknowledge that it was both of their faults for not incorporating the artist more.

Trump warns Tana that she’s close to being fired because she doesn’t exhibit the traits that he’s looking for. He asks Alex if Tana has what it takes. Alex doesn’t think that she’s tough enough. Tana starts standing up for herself and says that she can do the job that Trump wants her to. She says that she’s been mostly successful and is a born leader. Also, she has a better record than Alex.

Alex has trouble counting. Trump points out that Tana knows Alex’s record better than he does, but Alex notes that it’s to her advantage to know it. Trump says that it would have been to Alex’s advantage to tell the truth. Hey, don’t call him a liar just because he can’t count. Call him a kindergartener or something instead.

So, to sum up, Tana was bad, but she’s been better in the past. Trump thinks that Alex spent the task sitting back and hoping that Tana would fail. I wouldn’t go that far. It’s not like he’s Craig and she was Kendra. Anyway, Alex is fired.

In the cab, Alex waxes philosophical for three minutes. Man, Bren’s 42 second cab talk last week really spoiled me. Alex says that records are important to Trump, but the numbers aren’t important to him. He’d rather just balance his wins and losses and try to make sure he’s winning more than losing. He’s learned again that he has no fear. Alex says that he loved it when George started beating on him; he has a lot of respect for George. He also seems like he might have a little crush on Carolyn.

Alex says that he calls his own shots. He quotes William Ernest Henley’s “Invictus” - “It matters not how straight the gate / How charged with punishments the scroll / I am the master of my fate / I am the captain of my soul.” Yeah, he wouldn’t have lasted long working for Trump with that attitude. Alex says that he got to do 14 tasks and live 14 lives. He’s had great experiences and thinks that he and Bren will be friends forever. He doesn’t think that Trump made a mistake in firing him.

Alex thinks that Trump wants to hire Tana, who he calls “lovely.” He thought that he would be fired tonight. He thinks that Trump encouraged Tana to fight for herself. The whole experience has been an “extended question” - who should he be? Where will he go next? He’s learned that businesses can be built quickly, and he wants to go home and stat a new life.

Next week: interviews, interviews, interviews!

Jenn Brasler is an aspiring writer from Falls Church, VA. You can e-mail her at luckyjenn@hotmail.com. She's trying to decide whether to use her powers for good…or evil. She will write for money. Or candy. Or clothes from Old Navy.

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