The Apprentice 4, Episode 1 Extras: Melissa vs. Kristiby Jenn Brasler -- 09/26/2005
Welcome back for another season of The Apprentice, complete with extra footage only seen on Yahoo! If you thought the candidates would be a little more normal and a little less dramatic this season, you were wrong. So let’s get straight to the madness.
Well, first, we have to see everyone packing and getting ready to go to New York. Big business, here we come! Does anyone have all 18 of the candidates’ names memorized yet? Just wondering. Trump tells us that his show rocks. He tells us what he wants in an apprentice. This is not a game. If you say so, Trump. The candidates hail cabs. Trump tells us that these people rock. Melissa talks about how she rocks. Randal talks about how he rocks. Alla talks about how she rocks. They all head to New Jersey to meet up with Trump. Trump has something unexpected planned. He’s going to fire everyone right away and spend the next few weeks watching Survivor? He thinks this is someone’s dream job.
Over in New Jersey, Trump informs everyone of the helicopter race. This would be a lot more fun if they were all in helicopters and had to race each other. Or if they had to navigate eel-infested waters. Or if it were like Richard Connell’s The Most Dangerous Game, where the guy watches humans get hunted. That’s actually what I thought of when I saw this scene. Anyway, there’s running. Chris almost plows into Trump, which Trump finds amusing, especially since Chris used to be in the NFL. The women are smart and jump in golf carts. More running. The men win anyway. The girls decide that this doesn’t matter and they can’t quit.
Excel works at their Bally’s location. They get a woman to sign up, but she learns that the class costs $20 and changes her mind. Chris laughs over the fact that she just bolted as soon as she realized she would have to pay that much. He decides that they need to evaluate whether or not things are going to work. He and Josh decide to drop the price of the class to $10. Markus doesn’t like this idea, even though Chris says that people keep balking at $20.
Markus says he won’t refute Chris’ findings, he’s just reporting what his are. He doesn’t want to negate the class by selling it for too little. Markus says it’s not about selling the most, it’s about selling the best. Well, actually, in this task, it’s about selling the most. Hence, whichever team makes the most money, wins. Markus feels like his team is backing him into a corner. Josh doesn’t think they’ll win if they keep the price at $20, and the whole team agrees. He says that during times of pressure, they need a leader who will make decisions and move on them. Obviously, Markus isn’t that person. Markus finally approves the price drop but doesn’t want to change their offer.
Capital Edge finishes their research and discusses what they should charge for the class. Here goes Melissa, ranting and talking about what Hispanic people want and generally making an Omarosa of herself. Kristi tries to control her, but doesn’t have much luck.
Kristi watches the class she choreographed. Marshawn thinks they’ll win. Kristi asks a couple of the Bally’s employees if they thought Capital Edge would bring in this much money. They admit that they didn’t, especially from the prices they’re charging. Kristi says that they succeeded because they were passionate. She loves winning. Don’t count your chickens, Kristi.
Rona calls Excel. Hi, Rona! Trump talks to Markus. Well, Markus talks. Trump doesn’t get much of a chance. He tells George that Markus talks a lot.
Capital Edge admires the suite they’ll be living in. Felisha and Kristi quickly claim a room. Toral is happy that there’s food in the suite. Excel arrives, and Josh says that coming into the suite felt like coming home. “Let the games begin,” he announces. “And tell Betsy I’m married. And so is she!” James (who?) thinks it will motivational to have everyone living in the suite together, though he knows they’ll eventually clash. He reminds us that you never know what will happen there.
Randal calls home and his wife tells him that his grandmother’s funeral will be on Monday morning. Either they didn’t show him getting the news about his grandmother’s death or he knew before he came and is just know learning about the funeral arrangements. It’s hard to tell. Randal fills the other guys in and says that he has mixed emotions about being there.
The teams head to the boardroom. Trump says that they’ve finished the first battle. George and Carolyn give the results. Excel wins. They get to go to the Friars Club. We know all of this. Let’s get to the drama!
Capital Edge will come back to the boardroom, someone will be fired, blah blah blah. Trump keeps Randal behind to talk to him about what he wants to do. Randal will stay, since his grandmother would want him to. Trump nicely offers the use of his helicopter so Randal can go to the funeral.
Excel goes to the Friars Club. They eat in the Milton Berle room. Josh calls the reward “sick” and says it’s better than sex. Must… not… make… joke… at… Betsy’s… expense…. Trump asks Chris if he saw him when he almost ran into him back at the golf course. Chris admits that he didn’t. Trump says that that’s why he’s a good football player - he only sees the goal. Chris tells us that this was a great compliment to get from Trump. Trump jokes that if Chris had run him over, that would have been the end of The Apprentice.
Trump makes the mistake of engaging Markus in conversation. Markus says that he likes skiing and football. He keeps talking, but Trump has lost interest, so he turns to Brian (I think; it’s the short one, whatever his name is) and asks if he likes jockeys. Ouch! Fortunately, Brian takes it well. As someone who stands just over 5 feet, you kind of have to just laugh it off. And then go back to plotting to take over the world.
One of the guys (possibly Markus) asks Trump for his secret to success. Trump reports that it’s never quitting. Quitting is for losers. No, he really said that. He’s seen a lot of smart people fail because they gave up, but he’s seen a lot of less smart people become very successful because they didn’t know what quitting meant. Markus tries to talk again. Trump thinks that the guys will be on Markus’ case for talking so much. The guys discuss the possibility of Markus’ exemption. Trump says that people don’t change.
In the suite, Kristi says that in the boardroom, she’ll focus on Melissa’s issues and on what she herself did well. She wishes that she had been able to manage Melissa better. Melissa and Jennifer M. (uh, oh, bad sign) discuss Kristi. Jennifer tells Melissa that she was a good worker, but that was cancelled out by her negativity. Melissa says that she’s not concerned about going to the boardroom. She knows that they lost the task because of a lot of things, but they weren’t things she was in charge of. Ah, yes, the “that wasn’t my responsibility so it wasn’t my fault” defense. Always a classic. Jennifer says they lost because they made bad decisions collectively.
It’s boardroom time! This right here is why the Martha Stewart version of this show disappointed me. Where are the knock-down, drag-out boardroom battles? Trump asks Capital Edge why they lost. Marshawn blames marketing. Carolyn asks about the XXX decision. Kristi blames Melissa for the loss and Melissa laughs. She says that she asked people what they would be comfortable paying, then tried to push a little more. Kristi announces that Melissa wanted to charge $10. Melissa blames Kristi for the loss. She lists all of Kristi’s problems, which sound suspiciously like her own.
Alla speaks up that the task should have been an effort put forth by the entire team, but Melissa didn’t give 100 percent. Carolyn says that Melissa told her she was doing everything. Melissa claims that this is true, but everyone else thinks she’s crazy. Alla says that Melissa makes things up in her mind that are really lies, but she convinces herself they’re true. I’ve known people like that. They’re really, really annoying. Alla tells Melissa that everything she’s said in the boardroom has been a lie. Rebecca (who looks eerily like Evangeline Lilly from Lost) speaks up that the team won’t be able to make it with Melissa around.
Marshawn says that she’s come to her decision independent of the group, but she thinks that Trump should fire Melissa. She thinks that Melissa insulted everyone else’s intelligence with her talk about what Hispanic people want. As a minority woman, Marshawn understands Melissa’s position, but she points out that there are 9 beautiful, intelligent women on the team and they would be able to make things work. She notes that with four blonds on the team, they still did well in Spanish Harlem. She thinks that Melissa made the mistake of underestimating the others and that negativity is kryptonite.
Jennifer W. says that Melissa told her she lost respect for Kristi. Trump asks Melissa who she thinks the strongest team member was. Melissa names Jennifer M. Trump decides to point out that she made the top ten in the Miss USA pageant. Jennifer M. can’t remember her placement but thinks she was sixth. “Five and a half,” she jokes. Alla agrees that she did an amazing job. See, Trump? Beautiful women can be smart and do well in business. Why does he always seem surprised by that? You’d think he’d have learned after so many years of working with Carolyn. Jennifer M. says that she thinks Trump should fire Melissa. She causes friction and drama. Melissa says that she needs to keep her feelings in check. Yes, Melissa, that’s your biggest problem. This woman is delusional.
Kristi takes the risk of asking if she can just bring one person back to the boardroom. Trump agrees and Kristi picks Melissa. That was kind of dumb of Kristi, since it reduced her chances of getting out of there. But on the other hand, it’s hard to decide who else she could have brought without making it seem personal. It doesn’t seem like any of the other women did that bad of a job. Plus, Kristi probably thought (correctly) that she was a lot safer than Melissa.
Trump and his associates confer. Carolyn says that Kristi and Melissa both had problems, but George thinks Melissa was worse. Hey, it’s Robin! Hi, Robin! Still screening your calls in case Raj tries to ask you out? Kristi and Melissa return to the boardroom. Trump tells Kristi that she portrayed good leadership by picking just Melissa. I really can’t tell if he’s being serious. Kristi says that Melissa was the team’s weak link. Melissa thinks her mistake was letting Kristi get under her skin. However, this mistake didn’t lose them the task, while Kristi’s mistakes did.
Trump asks Kristi if she thinks they lost because of Melissa. Of course she does. She says that Melissa challenged the prices in front of customers. She thinks that this created inconsistency, and you can’t run a business when there isn’t consistency. Melissa says that everyone said she was negative, then admits that she doesn’t work well with women. Gee, I wonder why not? While Melissa goes on and on about this, Kristi tries to say something to Carolyn, probably about a past experience working with women, but she can’t be heard over Melissa. Trump notes that there’s a beauty queen on the women’s team, but Melissa doesn’t think that Jennifer M. was intimidated by her.
Carolyn reminds Melissa that more than half of her team said they have no respect for her. George tells her that intimidation doesn’t work in the executive world because it creates a hostile environment. He asks if Melissa doubts that the other women don’t think she was nice. Melissa says that she talked to all of the women except Alla and Felisha and they all said it would be fun to work with her again. Because they couldn’t tell her to her face that they hate her. George isn’t sure about this and notes that the other women aren’t there to confirm or deny that.
And then we really get into it. Melissa announces that she doesn’t think she would have any trouble working with the other women again, especially if Kristi weren’t around. She would be positive and contribute. George asks why she wasn’t positive this time around. Melissa starts repeating things she’s said before, which means that she’s run out of things to say to support herself. She says that everything will be fine once Kristi leaves. Kristi says that waiting for someone you don’t like to leave isn’t the way things work in the business world. Melissa exclaims that she doesn’t need to worry about that because Kristi will go home. “You don’t belong here,” Melissa tells her. She also says that Kristi is “inprofessional.” Oh, I see we’re inventing words again this year.
Trump asks, because it isn’t already completely obvious, if Melissa and Kristi don’t like each other. Melissa has no problem stating that she doesn’t like Kristi. She thinks she’s manipulative (show me some proof) and has been negative. She thinks Kristi has been approaching people one on one and trying to get their support. Melissa realizes that she should have done the same thing. Melissa is delusional.
Trump announces that everyone thought Melissa was disruptive, whether she’s responsible for the loss or not. Kristi was a bad leader and didn’t do great with the marketing, but Melissa was a lot worse, no matter what she claims the others told her. Melissa is fired.
In the cab, Melissa… keeps talking about Kristi. She doesn’t like Kristi, though she thought the other women were cool. She wishes them luck. She was harsh with Kristi and didn’t (and doesn’t) care how the others saw her, because it has no impact on her life. Except that it got you fired. She doesn’t think Kristi will go very far. Wouldn’t it be hilarious if Kristi won? I’d laugh. Melissa thinks that Trump liked her (still looking for evidence, here) and says that he was kind and fair.
Melissa isn’t shocked that everyone wanted her to go home. She didn’t care enough to try to befriend them. She wonders if she’s too independent for her own good. Yes, that must be it. She’s grateful for the opportunity and happy that she met Trump. She thinks that he’s a big fan of hers. See? Delusional. She wonders if they can have lunch sometime.
Yahoo! has added a new feature, the exit interview. It’s basically a combination of an extended cab confessional and clips of the episode. Melissa tells us that she thought she was the whole package but she had to choose between her family and her task. Apparently she had to decide between doing what everyone else wanted to do and making her family proud. I’m not sure exactly what she means by this. I think it has something to do with talking about what the Hispanic people at Bally’s would want. Melissa’s logic confuses me.
Melissa knows that she has issues with women but claims that when they get to know her, they really like her. She knows that either she or Kristi had to go. She feels that she was literally voted off. She thinks the price was a big issue and that the other women on the team were misreading the customers. Basically, she was right, they were wrong. She also doesn’t think that the other women liked her bluntness. Her biggest weakness was not caring. She says that if you’re not family, you shouldn’t bother, because she won’t care. What a wonderful woman.
Melissa thinks that Kristi is childish, rude, obnoxious, and fake. Someone kill me now. This woman has lost her mind. She has no respect for Kristi and can’t work with her. Melissa liked the men, especially Randal, Chris, Mark, and Josh. She calls Josh an idiot, though she says she means it in a loving way. She also liked Marshawn, Rebecca, Toral, and Jennifer M. So, basically anyone who we saw for more than a few minutes. She says that she and Jennifer M. are friends, though I wonder what Jennifer would say about that.
It was nice for Melissa to learn about others’ backgrounds and jobs. She says that Trump didn’t critique her. She thinks she benefited from being fired first because it meant she got to go home. I’m thinking she didn’t understand the point of the whole show. She calls herself fortunate and claims that she tried to be honest, genuine, and hardworking. The question is, I guess, how hard did she try? Melissa finishes up by saying that Kristi’s true colors will come out. Hey, did you guys know that Melissa doesn’t like Kristi? Why didn’t someone tell me?
Next week: sanity, I hope.
Jenn Brasler is an Assistant Editor of RealityNewsOnline and an aspiring writer from Falls Church, VA. You can e-mail her at firstname.lastname@example.org. If she met Melissa in real life, she would be so intimidated that she would have no choice but to pull her hair.
Be sure to sign up for our e-mail update so you can stay informed about new articles on the site! And take a look at the rest of the site. You can find all of our recent articles on this show at our The Apprentice page and take a look at our sections on Survivor: Palau and Amazing Race 7. You can even buy reality show stuff at our Reality TV Store!
For more news about The Apprentice, be sure to check out SirLinksALot: The Apprentice Page!